IsThere Love on the Stage?

Performers tend to be a very emotional people, so if there's one piece of advice I could give for you singers and dancers out there: don't date. Ever. But if you must, there are some important facts one should know about attempting to form a lasting relationship with a performance artist that may sway your decision. In general, we tend to be vain, self-important, slightly delusional, and extremely snobby, but we have bad qualities too.

Speaking from experience as someone who is currently dating a singer/dancer, one thing most performers lack (surprisingly enough) is self-confidence. You would think that someone who makes a living off of impressing other people and who often carries about a pretentious air about him/her would be extremely confident underneath it all, but like all shows of egotism, they only serve to mask an underlying insecurity. This is why dancers, and to a lesser extent singers, are over-obsessed with their looks, trying to make themselves appear extremely put together, when in reality they are often big messes with a lot of emotional issues.

Not to knock performers (after all, I am one myself), but we are artists, and like all great artists, we are highly emotional and volatile. Again, a lot of this melodramatic nature stems from heightened insecurity, but it is prevalent nonetheless. We are also relatively bi-polar, and our moods will fluctuate greatly based on how an audition went, or a few small events which occurred throughout the course of the day. Prone to fits of self-loathing and depression, performers are often very difficult to deal with, as we get sick of being "all we can be" for everyone twenty-four-seven, and tend to become reclusive and aloof around the person we love.

On the positive side, however, singers and dancers are also extremely passionate about what they do, which spills over into the romantic aspects of their lives. They are extremely sentimental and caring, and will create an entire day for their loved one on an anniversary, birthday, or sometimes for no reason at all. Along with being sensitive about themselves, they are be surprisingly sensitive when considering the feelings of others, even if they might not think of them right away.

Jealousy is no stranger to a performer. This comes along with the dramatic attitude, but since the entertainment industry is a highly competitive field and is all about showing yourself off and being the absolute best at what you do, vocalists and dancers are very intense when it comes to having relationships with other people. They will be jealous of their partner for being more successful, as well as become jealous of their partner making friends of the opposite (or same, as the case may be) sex. Generally, not much can be done about this except to ignore the person's reactions and understand that it sort of comes with the territory.

Many performers are flaky in their relationships, romantic and platonic, and will seem to forget about important events and brush over people's feelings at times. This could lead to drama and might make you want to explode, venting how you feel toward them, but this is a bad idea. Mostly because it will cause unnecessary tension, but also because performers live for drama. It fuels them and makes them excited, even if the drama is extremely hostile. The best one can do when dealing with a melodramatic performer friend is to remain the calm and practical one, even when your partner cannot. Most singer/dancers are great people; they just need someone to balance out their bipolar tendencies.

That said, long-term relationships are very rare in the entertainment industry, as one can easily tell by picking up any pop magazine. This arises mostly because performers never really know what they want, and are constantly changing their minds. They are rather unstable, and although they will make great lovers and short-term flings, it is very tough for someone to put up with someone like this for too long of a time, especially if they are not used to roller-coaster relationships. Surprisingly, when two performers get together, it is not always a disaster. Either you are dealing with two utter drama queens who constantly are jealous of the other and competing for attention, in which case the relationship is doomed from the start, or you get two different personalities: one crazy, egocentric nut job and the other equally insecure and crazy, but less obnoxious. If this is the case, there is the slight chance the relationship will balance itself out and lead to a very successful, long-lasting, and happy romance.

With all this said, why would anyone really want to attempt dating a performer? Well, most people don't. But there are positives, especially if you are looking for a crazy, wild sex life or want to go around telling people "I'm dating a professional singer." Also, as self-absorbed as we may be, we can be caring and make life a lot more interesting, not to mention fun and adventurous. While it may not be totally advisable to date someone who is a dancer or singer, it might be worth trying if you are feeling brave.