It is Well with My Soul

Lately, for some reason, I have really been having a hard time. It's almost like a dark cloud has decided to park itself right over top of my head. It all started last Friday. The day actually started out very well. I went over to spend time with my client, Mae, and cooked her some rigatoni with home-made meat sauce. She was so thrilled. It had been a long time since she had anything much besides Meals-on-Wheels! Don't get me wrong, Meals-on-Wheels provides some pretty good meals, but like Mae said, it's just not like home-cooking! When I left her that day I was feeling pretty happy because she seemed to be coming out of her shell a little more.

I got out to the parking lot and then it hit...that dark cloud.

I locked myself out of my car while it was running...and it was almost out of gas. And it was one of the hottest, most humid days we had had in awhile. I was in a panic. I had no idea what to do. My purse and cell phone and everything were all locked up in the car. And of course, so was the extra key I have just in case something like this ever happens. Lot of good it was doing me now.

I ran back up to Mae's to see if she had a coat hanger. I wasn't real sure what I was going to do with it, but I've seen a lot of people use coat hangers when they were locked out of their cars. It was worth a try. She gave me the hanger and told me to please let her know if it worked. She seemed very concerned and I assured her I would.

Back down I went to try to see what kind of magic I could perform with the wire hanger. I got it as straight as I could, poked it in-between the door, and jammed it down inside the car but wasn't real sure how that was going to be any help. It wasn't strong enough to push down the button that unlocks the doors, even if I could get it anywhere near it. Already I was dripping with sweat and feeling light-headed from the heat.

I think I was about ready to faint from heat exhaustion when a man pulled up across from where I was parked. He was obviously coming home from work; I could tell by the long-sleeved dress shirt he had on and by the briefcase he was carrying. He looked tired and was probably thrilled to be home and couldn't wait to get inside to the air-conditioning and sit down and put his feet up. But I was desperate at that point and hollered over to him, "Mister! Can you pleeease help me!" I know it sounded like a whine because it was one. He looked at me kind of startled, I guess to see a grown woman standing there looking like she was ready to cry any minute (which, in fact, I was.) I could tell the last thing he wanted to do was to postpone getting inside his cozy home after a long day at work, but he very gallantly came over to see what he could do to help me.

He poked and prodded a little with the hanger and then informed me that it just wasn't strong enough to do anything (I could've told him that!) and I would probably have to call a locksmith. That's the last thing I wanted to do...number one because of the cost, and number two because I was sure my car would run out of gas by the time they got there. But, what choice did I have? I reluctantly agreed to allow him to call one for me. I followed him up three flights of stairs to his apartment, (it had to be on the very top floor didn't it?) and waited outside while he called. He ended up calling three or four to find the cheapest one. As I recovered from that terrible climb, which in the intense heat was comparable to climbing Mt. Everest, I realized this man, this stranger, really was going out of his way to help me. Maybe he was an angel in disguise or something...I think I was becoming delirious from the heat.

He finally found someone who would do it for $30 but it might be as long as a half hour before he could get there. I had to agree to it. I thanked the man profusely for his help and hurried down to my car to try again to perform some kind of magic with that hanger before the locksmith got there. If I could get it before he got there I could save myself $30 and hopefully not run out of gas! I got the bright idea to bend the end of the hanger into a hook so I could try to catch it on the door handle and yank it open. I managed to hook the handle quite a few frustrating times but it just wasn't strong enough. It bent back every time! I was dripping with sweat and so intent on what I was doing I didn't even notice a van had pulled up beside my car. I looked up through the wet strands of my hair to see a young man sitting in the driver seat of the car watching me with an amused expression on his face. I was about to plead with him for help, like I did that other poor man, when it dawned on me that it was the locksmith. Instead of being upset that he found my predicament amusing and realizing how I must look, I started to laugh and sighed with relief as he used some flat tool and quickly had the door open in a few seconds.

Okay, now I could go home! I got into the car and immediately heard "It Is Well With My Soul" coming from my car radio. At first I thought how inappropriate that song was at a time like this. Things certainly weren't well with my soul at the moment. The song continued and I was surprised at how comforting the words actually were and how calming it was to listen to. I thought about how Paul says to be content no matter what state you are in.

As I drove I began to think about Mae. She's 88 years old and lives all alone and has stopped caring about so much. When I first started going over there she hardly spoke. No matter what I suggested we do she agreed, only because she just didn't care one way or another. Today she had actually smiled when I brought her a big plate of rigatoni and she thanked me for making it for her over and over. She had even laughed and joked a couple
times after that. And when I returned to her apartment to borrow the hanger she was so genuinely concerned and made me promise to call her when I got home to let her know everything was fine. That was more emotion and signs of life than I had seen in her since I started going over two weeks ago.

When I got home I called her and told her everything that had happened...about the nice man who helped me and about having to finally call a locksmith. She told me she had almost come out of her apartment to walk down and see if I was alright. Tears welled up in my eyes at the thought of this old lady struggling with her walker to actually leave her apartment for me. The neighbors had told me that Mae had stopped coming out of her apartment and had pretty much stopped doing anything a couple years ago. "All she does is sit in that chair and stare", one concerned neighbor had told me. This couldn't be the same lady who was now chatting on the phone with me, laughing with me about how funny I must've looked struggling with that hanger! It seems like my dark cloud had somehow brought a little sun into Mae's life. Or maybe it was the rigatoni.

That Friday began a series of mishaps... a weekend with no electricity in our house; the hot water heater burned out so we had no hot water... I never received my paychecks for the past two weeks... my back has been really hurting lately...

but, black cloud or not... it is well with my soul.