It's a Conspiracy! (Shhhhhh)

What if the polls are actually a big Democratically backed media conspiracy? Huh? Huh? Maybe? Okay, okay, follow me on this.

First they show Obama with a giant lead. This makes the Republicans angry. They cry foul. They shout "Media bias!" The polls see-saw back and forth in some key states, which keeps these cries of media bias just a fringe thing. Don't want to let anybody get to close to the truth. Then, just before the election, the polls swing heavily in the opposite direction, giving McCain a tie or even a lead. Obama and associates start saying, it ain't over til its over, yadda yadda yadda!

Suddenly, people who would have most likely not gone out to vote, even though they said they would, actually do go out and vote. And Obama wins by a landslide.

Cold and calculated. But it gets the job done.

Oh, oh, here's another one. Obama is an alien, or a visitor from the future. He comes here to avert a great tragedy. But one catch. He's kind of crazy. So instead of averting the tragedy, he falls into the messiah line that everyone is spouting and he ends up causing the tragedy he came here to prevent.

This one would really explain all the holes in his background and why he won't talk about it or even let it be addressed.

Oh, oh, what if you aren't that into alien or time travel things. Here you go. What if he is actually a member of a sleeper cell that was designed to come into the US, take power and send us into ruination. He could bankrupt the country's morals and ruin our economy and involve us in countless wars . . . whoops, he didn't do that. Never mind.

But he could be an old Russian plant. Or maybe an al-Queada operative. But that wouldn't really explain why he is so whipped by Michelle. Hmmmmmmm, we'll let that one stew.

Oh, oh, here is a really good one!

What if he is this guy, see, who really wants to effect some change. He kind of falls in with a bit of a liberal crowd, but he still has the good intentions he started out with. Then he gets shoveled into the national spotlight. He finds himself so incredibly close to being able to effect some really good things for people. Then his head swells with the fame and the god complex and he starts to believe his own spin. And he ends up just like every other jerk who promises to "change the world" and make the average man (and woman's) life better, but just shoots blanks and doesn't get the job done.

Or maybe, just maybe, this is like an old episode of Dallas, where we wake up in the morning and find the last 16 years never really happened.

Gee, wouldn't that be cool?