IT'S a SAD DAY when FAT PEOPLE TRY to STEAL LITTLE DEBBIE CAKES..

WHEN FAT PEOPLE TRY TO STEAL SNACK CAKES...IT IS A SAD DAY...

What is worse than a huge beast of a woman standing in line in front of me with her two wild boar children? A huge beast of a woman standing in line in front of me with her two wild boar children trying to buy boxes of little Debbie cakes with counterfeit money. If I'm lying, I'm dying. Not only was this woman so huge and bloblike, but she was wearing one of these God awful T-shirt dresses. So NOT ONLY was I forced to look at 300 pounds of the most disgusting display of gluttony, I was forced to see it in bad fashion.

Her children? They were a short order version of their Lard connection only their sex would have been undetermined if not for the homemade curly string red bow on the female. It were as if a marshmallow had a pair of eyes and of course a mouth on it, but one had a tacky bow. When she went to pay for her daily supply of fat builder, the cashier marked it with her little yellow marker as they always do. When the mark turned up red instead of yellow, she is obligated to call the manager and keep the money until that time. This angered the Cotton wrapped beast. It begin to stomp it's tree trunk like legs, and kick the checkout with her hoof. It was then I noticed her fake keds were about to pop open from being over stretched, and her socks had already snapped a few of the elastic bands. I almost forgot to pay attention to what was going on I was so fixated on her feet.

Almost on cue, the little beast started crying. They couldn't understand why they couldn't get their fudge rounds and nutty buddy bars. My thoughts, and what I tried to intervene in the argument, was "It shouldn't be a big deal if you honestly didn't know the money might be counterfeit, when she calls the manager it should be all straightened out." The dollar store yeti turned it's acne covered bi-nocular glasses wearing mound at me and informed me to keep my opinions to myself. It then went crazy, screaming and yelling. It scared the Little Debbie delivery man so bad he hid behind the little Debbie stand. Just like a man, hide while 2 women cashiers are forced to battle this thrifty lard beast.

Well, the police were called, and she tried to run out of the store with her offspring behind her. She got in her busted car and tried to I guess drive away, when her car decided to stall. It would crank, let her back up, then die. The whole time she is screaming out the window, "I'm telling my husband! Ya'll upset my kids! Ya'll upset my kids!". The police came, we saw them outside trying to calm the beast down...and I think after 5 minutes of having to look at her monstrosity of a face...they just said "fuck it". They drove off, as did she. I stayed a while inside and laughed at her with the cashiers and Little Debbie man. Who the cashiers wanted to beat up...