Jihad in South Park - a Call to the Faithful to Have a Little Faith

If you missed episodes 200 & 201 of South Park, it's worth an internet search to see what the controversy is about. Unfortunately, Comedy Central is not likely to re-run these episodes. They have succumbed to the fear of reprisals which, ironically, these two segments satirize. Religious figures from Moses to Muhammad, celebrities from Tom Cruise to Barbara Streisand, groups from ginger kids to the show itself were satirized.

But it is the fact that Muhammad was included that has some Muslims up in arms. Ironically, Muhammad wasn't directly depicted in these episodes, unlike a previous episode that went unnoticed by Muslim extremist. That's right, not only is it not OK to show Muhammad, it's not OK to not show Muhammad.

What this boils down to is freedom of speech versus violence. If some radical Muslim group decides Matt Stone and Trey Parker, South Park's creators, writers, and producers, need to die for a cartoon, all I can say is, "That's pretty messed up and exemplifies primitive thinking." I guess there is a reason the Muslim calendar is 622 years behind the Gregorian calendar. Muslim extremists think and act like they're living in the 14th century. Seriously, guys, we have electricity, flight, and even space travel. Join us in the 21st century. Knock off all the intolerance.

If you are so unsure of your religion that you have to threaten violence and commit acts of violence to keep your believers in line and punish the infidel, your religion is founded on a pretty shaky premise. In my opinion, Islam is founded on a pretty shaky premise anyway. It's basically just a conglomeration of all the other religions floating around the Middle East in the late 6th century AD.

Basically, you had a guy, Muhammad, who was a traveling salesman. While young and impressionable, he traveled with his uncle on business trips. He picked up bits and pieces, books and stories, from Jews and Christians. He got the idea that monotheism was superior to polytheism and took that attitude back home to Arabia where all the mud farmers were still worshiping rocks. He then married a wealthy woman, had too much free-time, went camping one day, starved himself in a cave until he was delusional, and wrote a rambling manifesto about his experience.

Then he decided to take his new versions of all the old stories and systematically convert all the ignorant mud-farming polytheists he came across. As his power grew, he wrote down more ideas to fit his changing circumstances. For example, polygamy wasn't one of Muhammad's original ideas. After all, his wife had all the money and he certainly didn't want to piss her off. But as he needed to make alliances with other tribes, suddenly polygamy was a good idea. Marriage was a common way to sign a treaty in those days. It's funny how money and power change people.

So now some Muslim out there probably thinks I've ridiculed Muhammad or the Koran. I'm sure some radical Muslim wants me dead, but I'm just not famous enough to draw much publicity to their cause. Religious extremist are nothing if not politically expedient, attention whores. Just look at the Westboro Baptist wackados. They use religion as an excuse to stage their ridiculous antics. They live for publicity,

Whether you agree with me or not, my conscience and my government say I have the right to speak my mind freely. Likewise, Matt Stone and Trey Parker have that same right. Anyone who disagrees has the right to voice their dissent freely, but they can stop when they start calling for violence against another human being.

Maybe it's because coffee was discovered in Arabia. Maybe Muslims are all hopped up on caffeine. Maybe it's still the year 1388 for Muslims and they think despotism, violence, mutilation, slavery and all those other things in the Koran are still great ideas. Mr. Muslim, it comes down to this, how strong is your faith in Islam? If you really, really believe that Islam is the true religion of the one, true God, maybe you should have a little faith and let Allah work out his own vengeful plan.

If Allah can send an earthquake to frighten young women into not having premarital sex*, surely he can deal directly with the creators of South Park. If Allah is the true god of the universe, he really doesn't need a helping hand from some poor schmuck living in a cave or a run-down apartment in the Bronx. I guess your faith isn't very strong if you think Allah is so powerless that he needs your pathetic help.

You can watch the author ranting in much stronger language a draft copy of this article at YouTube

*_{Iranian Ayatollah, Kazem Sedighi, claims recent earthquakes are a warning to young women to dress modestly and not lead young men astray.}