Judging Others by Size; Is it Right or is it Cruel?

"Fatty fatty two by four," "Thin as a board", "Two ton Tilly," "Skinny Minnie," These taunts and others are what the those who don't meet someones idea of what is an acceptable size endure as they are growing up. As adults the cruelty continues in more subtle ways. The following is just one woman's story.

She was a beautiful woman with long auburn hair and astonishing green eyes. A Talented, intelligent wife and mother. She lived in the suburbs and belonged to the VFW auxiliary. She painted beautiful pictures and played the piano. She was also a published author. She had a secret. Every day when she looked in the mirror she hated herself! This is how she lived her unhappy life. Why? Well because she didn't have a 22 inch waist. What she did have was cellulite on her thighs. and a bit of a double chin. she would diet constantly with her weight going up and down. she was miserable. The self loathing would escalate as she tried without success to become thin. Why did this beautiful woman suffer so? As a child she quickly learned To be excepted you must not be fat! It is the unforgivable sin in our society. The last bastion of acceptable discrimination. If you are fat you can be charged double for an airline seat. If you are fat, people who would otherwise never think of being so rude, feel it is ok to comment on your weight. If you are fat you must endure the fat jokes that are considered so funny by those who never suffered with obesity. You will be expected to do any thing and every thing to slim down to an acceptable size, even risk your life with surgical procedures and high risk diet aids. After all you haven't the right to be happy if you don't conform to the accepted standards of weight.

The above mentioned woman died at age 75 of cancer. She was happy about the cancer because for the first time she could remember she was thin. I remember her saying that she didn't want to eat anymore because she was afraid she would gain weight back . At the time she weighed 58 pounds. To her dying wasn't the crucial issue, weight was. This is a result of a lifetime of being so cruelly judged by others and herself for her size. How can people feel it is alright to cause such agony for someone's entire life because of the way that they look? I have yet to meet one person who is perfection yet anyone of them would be insulted if I were to point out what I believed to be their flaws.

To my Knowledge it is not illegal to be over weight or under weight so why is judgment acceptable? Could it be because we want everyone to conform to what a few have deemed to be appropriate size and weight? Must we all conform or be punished by the cruelty of those whom feel they have the right to judge others by whatever standard they see fit?

When We chose to judge others there is going to be a cost. The cruel judgment of others has caused so much pain to those who are the victims of this un-warranted loathing, that some have committed suicide. Others have withdrawn into seclusion and yet others have struck back by harming those who have caused them so much pain. Why would anyone feel it is their right to so cruelly judge anyone else because of their size? Is hurting others the only way for them to feel they are superior? Before one makes a judgment regarding anyone else, take a good look at yourself and you will find that you are not perfection either. You better hope that you meet up to all standards of perfection or you may be the next victim of unjust scrutiny. Now it is size, tomorrow it may be something else. what is wrong with people that they always have to find a way to belittle others? Remember just because you like being small or tall, thick or thin doesn't mean everyone else has to conform to your idea of what is attractive.