Just Divorced? Why You Shouldn't Jump Back Into Dating

Everyone can remember a relationship they wish they had avoided altogether. Heed these important warning signs to keep your emotional life as healthy as possible.

1. You are recently separated, divorced, or have recently ended a significant romantic relationship.

Nothing clouds our judgment worse than having recently come away from a significant romantic relationship. Your heart aches. You are lonely.

If you decide to go on dates after such a painful breakup, be sure to proceed very slowly and cautiously. Introduce the new person to your friends you know and trust, and ask them their honest opinion.

Deep down, you ultimately know what is best for you. But, when you are already in such a painful emotional state, you may not be able to see it clearly in that moment.

2. You are in a vulnerable position in your life.

Although you may have ended your last significant relationship over a year ago and are definitely ready to move on, there may be other reasons to use caution because of your vulnerable state of mind.

A loved one may have died recently. You have moved to an area that is culturally different from where you are used to living, and you have not gotten a good feel for the new culture yet. Perhaps you have become unemployed.

Because you may not be thinking on the level you normally do, use caution when becoming romantically involved.

3. You cannot trust the person.

You may have caught a potential romantic partner telling white lies. Or, you suspect him or her of lying about something major, like whether she is married or whether he has children. Trust your instincts.

There is a difference between actively telling lies and withholding information. A person cannot be expected to tell you their most intimate life details on a first date. But, if you are progressing to a point where you have revealed personal information, the other person should correspondingly tell you personal information, too.

Watch out for signs of a pathological liar. If you tell him you are separated but not yet divorced and he tells you he is divorced, but you later find out he is actually still married, this is a major, unforgivable problem. The fact that you were revealing personal information about yourself, that you are not yet divorced for example, opens the door for him to reveal corresponding information. The fact that he openly lies when it should have been easy for him to tell the truth may be a sign that he is a pathological liar.