Keep Your Religion to Yourself and I'll Keep My Opinion of it to Myself

There were those people this season that constantly bombarded me with the "It's Merry Christmas not Happy Holidays" rant. First off for all of you lemmings out there who need to hitch your wagon to some sort of organized soul stealing, morality for morons spewing, rejecting reality and substituting their religion, group of bible thumping zealots: GET A GRIP! Do you go to church every week? Do you go to confession with a list of every four-letter word you say so you get your full boat of hail Mary's for contrition? Do you think Jesus was an albino? Because that is just about the only way to explain a white boy with blond hair and blue eyes being born in a cave in Jerusalem 2046 years ago. Oh and by the way research shows that he wasn't even born in December he would have been born in March and the Epiphany didn't happen until June of that year. Do you even know what the Epiphany is? Let me enlighten you. It's the arrival of the wise men... I'll let you look up the historical truth behind the rest of that story for yourselves. Boy, are you in for a surprise!

Christmas as we know it is a hijacked holiday. Its origins are PAGAN! It was a celebration of the passing of the solstice and surviving the longest day of the year. The symbolism was the rebirth of the earth not of a chosen few men and those "non-believers" actually believed in more than your narrowly written and edited with a bent toward financial gain bible will ever allow you to comprehend. The candles you're so fond of putting in the windows were left burning to light the way of the weary travelers and as invitation into homes to share what was left of the winter food stores. Of course Christians took it to the extreme and lit up the whole house and every tree they could find. You never know when one more mini-light will make the difference between heaven or hell.

Have you ever wondered why Hanukah isn't "the holiday"? Why didn't we go with getting 12 days off instead of one? It's right around the same time of year. Why are "the holidays" so Christian centric? We recognize other beings as worthy of holidays. George Washington and Abraham Lincoln for example. Granted they are now consolidated into president's day but there is Martin Luther King Jr. who still has his own day. I know some people who actually use a sick day to observe that one. We in RI even have Victory Over Japan Day! I once had a teacher who was Greek Orthodox and every year we had a substitute on the day she acknowledged her religious beliefs because no one else was going to do it for her. Is any one day off generic enough to cover all religions? Why not just give us all of them off? With pay, of course.

Imagine there is some cataclysmic event on earth and all is lost but some pockets of humans who have no computers and no books and pass on their own limited scope of knowledge to each other. Imagine what bits of knowledge can be skewed into religion. Perhaps Martin Luther King Jr. will be turned into a religious juggernaut and take the place of Jesus. Osama Bin Ladin could have possibilities depending on who survives. A pack of wolves raise some kids they find in the forest and who knows what will happen. You get the point?

Seriously, if someone is wishing you a happy anything you should accept it and be glad because that is not generally what they are wishing on you. Also you should acknowledge that while you are a self-centered religious egomaniac those around you may not share your beliefs but they may be celebrating their own beliefs or just the fact that they get a paid day off because of yours.