Keeping Kids Motivated to Help Out Around the House

If you are like me you find that your kids have trouble staying motivated to do household chores. While chores are a great way to teach your kids responsibility and help give you at least a small break in your own household work; you must ensure the work is appropriate and is compensated accordingly. Here are some ways to work it out:

For younger kids (up to age 7 or 8) you must give immediate rewards. Take a note from their school teacher's walls on what might be appropriate rewards and punishments. You can make a poster listing their chores and the rewards for doing each - and consequences for not. Then when you ask your kids to complete a task make sure their reward is waiting when it is done.

For older kids (at least 8, but when your child is mature enough) make a weekly chart. Schedule the chart for Saturday through Friday and the reward is granted on Saturday (so they have the weekend to enjoy it). This teaches your kids what it is like getting a weekly "paycheck" from an employer.

There are many ways you can reward. Weekly you can offer a special lunch eaten out; or a reward based on work done (like an hourly wage), have your child count up the marks they made for the week and a set amount is given for each mark - a quarter is usually sufficient. Or you hand them a quarter when they put the last dish away or come back into the house after taking out the trash.

For my children I have a chart that is broken up into 3 parts. The first part lists all of the chores that are available, then next to each chore is the child's name who does that chore (so my 9 year old doesn't do all the 5 year olds' jobs and expect the same reward!) and also includes the "per diem" amount for each job and how often it can be done. So, taking out the trash pays 25-cents and can be done once a day. Cleaning the bathroom pays $2 but can only be done once a week. The next part is my 9 year olds' checklist. It is laminated so we use vis-à-vis (overhead) markers and wash them off on Saturday. She also has a special line where we write down how many marks she had each week - that way she can keep track of if she is doing more or less and can compensate for the next week. The final section is setup for "special" chores and rewards. These are chores that may be once a year (helping setup for Easter Dinner) or rewards that your child can trade in their marks for. During the summer I setup a special reward that 4 - 25-cent marks can be traded for a trip to the swimming pool.

So you don't want to pay your child a weekly allowance? If your child is old enough to understand saving and to be motivated you can offer a special incentive on a family trip. Every summer we go to the renaissance festival and my 9-year-old loves to dress up. She has a fairy costume but doesn't usually want to wear this - so she can trade in ten-dollars worth of marks and we will rent a costume for her. Or she wants to see a movie that is coming out, she can save her marks for a week ($5) and get a movie and a treat at the theater. Of course you have to accept that you will pay some too - children are smart enough that if you tell them they have to save $10 worth of marks and their reward is only $5 worth of stuff they are going to save up their marks for the money and buy it themselves!!

Keep chores fun. If you don't you will spend more time punishing you children for not doing the chore - and your kids will find themselves enduring your punishment rather than be motivated to complete the task. "A person will suffer greater angst to avoid an unpleasant task than complete it for mediocre rewards". Your child's reward is not only the money or special outing, but the knowledge that they did something that pleases their parents and family members. Don't just hand over the quarter - tell them, "great job, I'm so happy you did that so quickly!" and I guarantee the next time they will be twice a quick to hop to the task you set them to.

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