KGB - Behind the Scenes at the Knowledge Generation Bureau

You've probably seen the advertisements on TV for KGB - The Knowledge Generation Bureau. For a fee of $0.99 you can text to 542-542 (KGB-KGB), and have any question you have answered. You have probably thought, "Why would I pay $0.99 for an answer I can easily look up online?" I thought the same thing. However, if you've ever been in a situation where you're sitting at a bar having a debate with someone over some menial trivia fact, how would you prove who was right? Or, if you're nowhere near a computer and you'd like to know who won the game, what would be the easiest way to find out?

I've been working as a "special agent" for KGB for a little over a week. It didn't phase me until then how a service like this could actually be useful. There are many ways people are taking advantage of KGB. For example, people will text asking for phone numbers. Compared to how much dialing *411 on your cell phone would cost, it's actually cheaper to text KGB for the answer. Some cell phone carriers charge up to $1.99 for that service!

KGB can also tell you the weather forecast, your horoscope, recipes, lyrics, game scores, jokes etc. Basically, anything that is out there on the Internet, KGB will find it. They'll make you laugh too! Ask a funny question, get a funny response. They'll also throw in "extras" if they can. For example, if you ask how old a certain celebrity is. You may also receive an interesting fact about them as well. KGB agents are allowed 160 characters in their responses and are encouraged to use it by giving "extra" information revolving around the question that was answered.

Some of the most common things people ask are questions about celebrities, when movies or games are going to be released, what their name means and history questions. The questions get interesting. There are a lot of questions that come in about sexual topics, as well as people looking for advice or opinions. The advice and opinions are always backed up from some sort of reputable source on the Internet. If someone asks what is the best video game on the market, the agent will look at recent sales or polls. With every answer, they have to provide a source. The source won't go to the customer, but they are reviewed.

It's interesting to see what people ask. Every time I work a shift I find myself chuckling a few times. People really do try and stump us! Sometimes, when we answer they will text back "lol" or "thanks!" Customers are generally really surprised with what we come up with for answers. I'd say almost half of the questions are people trying to stump the agent. But, that's where the fun lays!

We get teenagers asking for advice a lot, or looking for information on things that they wouldn't feel comfortable asking a peer or parent. We do get questions asking about things that are illegal. Of course, these kinds of questions we are not allowed to answer legally. We can't instruct people where to find a prostitute or how to hide a dead body. These questions receive a general answer explaining that we can't and no charge.

The agent doesn't have to actually search for every answer. There are a lot of questions that come in several times a night. When a question pops up, there are similar questions that have been asked recently that pop up on a separate screen as well. The agent can peek at those and use one of those answers if it answers the same question. Several people will want to know who won tonight's baseball game, or the horoscope for Aries. Surprisingly enough, many people want to know where babies come from as well. The easiest question I had to answer? What is 1 + 1? So, not every question actually has to be researched. Most of the time, we're just making sure the answer is still good.

So, what are the most common questions?

• What's the meaning of life?
• How big is the biggest penis?
• Who holds the record for having the largest breasts?
• Can you milk a hamster?
• If a tree falls down in the woods and nobody is there to hear it, does it still make a sound?
• Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
• Why is the sky blue?

Want to know the answers? Well, you're going to have to text KGB to find out!