Kraft's New Ranch Dressing

Like many people, I grew up eating Ranch dressing on everything from veggies to French fries to pizza crust. I know it's not healthy at all, but I just can't help it. I still love Ranch, and I could still eat it on virtually anything.

There are several brands of Ranch dressing on the market. Some are good, some are completely disgusting. In my humble opinion, the worst one of all used to be one of the best: Kraft.

In an effort to be more health-conscious, Kraft has created new dressing formulas that do not contain the artificial flavors. From my experience (and from reading other people's posts on Kraft's website), it doesn't appear that these efforts were received positively.

The new dressing has one taste: Mayonnaise. When I tried it, I had just gotten back from a trip to the grocery store. I had bought a pack of fresh portabella mushrooms and a bottle of Kraft's "new" Ranch dressing for dipping. I was excited to try the new formula out. I'm not sure why, since the old one had nothing wrong with it. But anyway, I poured a glob of Ranch onto a dish, took it to my living room, and turned on the TV. I dipped a mushroom into the Ranch and happily anticipated a delicious bite. What I got instead was a gag reflex. Had I accidentally grabbed a jar of mayo from the fridge? Or could it be that the Ranch was expired? Neither.

I checked the expiration date. It said it was good for another year. Then I realized it must just be the new formula that I don't like. And then I wondered how on earth this had been tasted and approved for production.

I decided I'd try to salvage this little glob of Ranch, mostly because I'm stubborn, but also because I'd just paid for a brand new bottle of salad dressing that I was going to throw out immediately. I went back to the kitchen and mixed in some black pepper, garlic salt, lemon juice, dill, and even some powdered Ranch dressing mix. With all of that poking and prodding, it still just tasted like mayo.

I write this article as a warning to other fellow Ranch dressing lovers, especially the ones who grew up loving Kraft: Watch out! My recommendation is to make your own, or to go back to Hidden Valley, which still tastes great (even thought it's more expensive).

I know Ranch is bad for me, but I don't eat it because it's healthy. I'm not overweight, I'm not unhealthy, and I don't overdo it on the Ranch; I'd appreciate it if companies would let me manage my own health and my own weight instead of attempting to do it for me. If I want a truly healthy dressing, I'll pour some salsa on my salad.