Lab Rat

Jerry leaned back, put his hands behind his head, and smiled. This was the easiest job he'd ever had. Sure, there were some downsides, but none had ever made him think twice about his job as a safety testing engineer. That was a big job title for someone that was basically a human guinea pig.

Jerry had a friend in the pharmaceutical industry that had tipped him off to a company that was hiring. He had passed the interview with flying colors, and he had never regretted his decision.

He had weighed his options often, and the perks were completely worth the occasional hassle. He had a nice place to live, a very comfortable salary, and more perks than he could count. The downsides were miniscule in comparison. The sporadic rash or headache was more than worth it.

He was now in the middle of a two month study on the effects of a drug that was supposed to regulate brain chemistry. Jerry had never thought of himself as needing that type of adjustment, but the bonus for the trial was enormous compared to some others he'd seen lately.

He checked the clock and decided to head to the cafeteria. It was Taco Tuesday, after all.

He grabbed his plate and sat at his favorite table, waiting for Emilio to show up. Jerry and Emilio always raced to see who could finish their tacos first. It was surprising that Emilio wasn't here yet. He had met Emilio a week earlier, and they had become fast friends. Jerry looked around once more for his pal before diving into his lunch. Maybe he was doing some testing with the doctor assigned to both of them. Dr. Schwartz was another new guy, and he was pretty nice for a guy that pokes and prods you for fun.

He was so engrossed in his eating that he barely noticed the two lab assistants eating behind him. That is, he didn't notice them until he picked out some words like "test subjects," "new drug," "went crazy" and "all dead."

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Jerry was terrified. Emilio was missing, Dr. Schwartz was nowhere to be found, and he was afraid to talk to anyone else.

He didn't know how much longer he could hold on.

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The lab assistants murmured to each other as they cleaned out the room.

"What was up with that Jerry guy? He really went nuts there at the end," one said.

The other replied, "Yeah, first it was the imaginary Doctor Shorts or whatever. Then it was the imaginary friend he ate lunch with. I heard he had a history with psychosomatic illnesses, but the docs aren't saying what it was yet. I suppose he got the fork from the cafeteria, but who would have thought that he would use it to kill a doctor and then himself?"

The first one shook his head, saying, "Now that I think about it, he exhibited all the signs of those rats did in the new drug trial. You know, the one where they went crazy and killed each other. How weird is that?"

"Strange," the other agreed, "How about some lunch when we get finished cleaning this stuff up? It's Taco Tuesday, you know."

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