Ladies and Gentlemen Are in Fact Wired Differently When it Comes to Romance

Men don't believe that women study them, and women might not even be aware that they do- are you ladies, aware that you study men? Men are right brained, scientists tell us that this is the side of the brain that has to do with logic and arranging and relatively unemotional styles of thought; ladies are both hemispheres oriented, meaning that they consider things from both sides of the aisle, logic, strategic and emotional as well as holistic. [CLICK 1.] Men don't like to own up to this fact at times, for some reason it makes them have a feeling of being less than adequate in the brain trust- women study that- which makes sense, they use this power to sell men on things that otherwise men would strategize their way out of. This is pretty much how life has progressed on this planet in terms of the body human. [CLICK 2.] We can't mess with that, and to think that we can is simply illogical, it might make more sense to accept that the brain is as the brain is- [CLICK 3.] even when that brain tells us things we find hard to buy into; such as, you aren't a boy, you are a girl, or vice a versa. Hey (!)- I'm just sayin' that all forms of closed mindedness need to be recognized for the sort of particular dumb they represent, that's all- and probably we ought to stick in there that to heighten the hype around brain matters by clouding the water with all sorts of prejudices from other fields like legal and spiritual realms makes about as much sense as calling Chocolate, Steak. While taking that sentence in folks, bear in mind, men look at that as a strategic item, something to put on the back burner of their life for thought, ladies on the other hand, study that from all sides, including holistically.

Women have a distinct way of transmitting to a man what they want, but men sometimes miss the cue; [CLICK 4.]O.K., ladies I hear ya, "what'da'ya mean, sometimes!" Lets say that occasionally the signals sent out from the woman don't get all the way through the haze to the man who should get them, and our objective in these articles about sexy ways is to attempt to bring clarity to that aspect of our lives that many people don't want to discuss, much less, discuss frankly, sex. [CLICK 5.] Sex in particular with a slant toward the sensual rather than the physical (empirical), or, put another way, we aren't as focused on the consummation here, as we are the preparation, [CLICK 6.] which is what we believe is more difficult and lacking in our culture today without regard to gender. In another era and another time this was called romance.

Romance for a lady is not as easy as men might think, that is because men are so focused on the end result, ladies on the other hand, see the importance of the in between; and that, for the males, is hard to mentally and emotionally, get. [CLICK 7.] So one item we want to emphasize for women is how to place that emphasis for the man, where it belongs, and how to get him to think it through so he reaches your emotional plane. That's a tough one isn't it? And it isn't made any easier by the change in the cultural ways which we have become educated in- we are in the generational mix between mom's and occasionally dad's, who give advice many times from a non technology era, and young women, in this case, who live in an entirely different world. [CLICK 8.] This creates reference and advice and knowledge problems such as have never existed before. We can help each other in these confusing times by being very clear about romance.

Romance is different than sex, romance is different than, but certainly a part of love, yet it also hinges very closely by, friendship. Romance is appealing and attractive and seldom thought of by men in those terms, but almost always connected with those terms in the mind of the woman. Women believe in friendship where the center of the relationship holds against any forces exerted upon it, men have adjusted their cultural construct to allow them to fold under pressure; and the result is a lack of romance because there is a dire lack of friendship first. I want to be very specific here ladies in suggesting to you an "anti dating advice", approach to the training that men are getting. And the reason is simple, men are being taught to use objective and strategic skills to deal with you as a woman, toward a specific given end result by dating advice guru's. [CLICK 9.] I'm not here to "dis" the dating advice guru's, if men seek their advice, they must feel that need, [CLICK 10.] but what I am going to insist upon, ladies, is that you consider knowledge about what those guru's are putting out there. [CLICK 11.]

So let's be clear about what this knowledge about dating guru's advice can show us in terms of romance? First it shows us that if we don't know what they are learning, we won't understand some of the things they say. Because these things are aimed at a desired result of obtaining our phone number, ladies, we have no quarrel with them, do we? But it is the how that we want to focus on. In meeting men, it is the how that throws most ladies, and perhaps, most importantly, most young ladies, today. Meeting a man in a bar setting may not be the most suitable place to meet the single male. On the other hand, chat rooms designed for singles, may not be either- there is an awful lot of deceit going on out there- and, getting through that can be a mess ladies, can't it? Romance has always had a touch of the dishonest associated with it, in meeting the opposite sex, and in getting them to like you, there has often been a little deceit employed. Is that so harmful?

Second, but in no way less important, knowing what he is saying when he is using those lines, is important, they are constructs, they are strategies, they are designed to allow him to express his want, without exposing his need. Ladies knowing this can be crucial to you not getting "turned-off" to a guy who potentially could be a nice person. "Well if he is a nice person, why does he resort to such means?" That is a fair question, and to treat it fairly we are going to have to do another article continuing this subject. Be sure you can write us about this anytime you want and we will be putting that new article out soon.

Reference Links:
1. MSNBC report web based, Dr. Ruben Gur, http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16187129

2. Emotional wiring different: http://www.livescience.com/health/060419_brain_wiring.html

3. Business Study statistically illustrates thinking differences: http://www.foxbusiness.com/article/women-business-differences-female-male-brain-work-literally-253139.html

4. Psychology today study on women and men thoughts about sex: http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-2832.html

5. Scientific American article on sex differences: http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=00018E9D-879D-1D06-8E49809EC588EEDF

6. Eioda blog on 10 differences between women and men: http://www.eioba.com/a21815/10_situations_where_men_and_women_differ_so_much

7. Ohio State University Study Women and Men agree on romance: http://researchnews.osu.edu/archive/menconc.htm

8. MSNBC use of personal is changing: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4917480/

9. Not an endorsement of any kind by me- this is a paid dating guru site- so if you use it, do so because you want to, I do not endorse this site at all, I list it strictly as an example of what a so called dating guru site is: http://www.flirtadvice.com/

10. Blog for dating advice: http://pickupfuture.blogspot.com/

11. Not an endorsement of any kind - this is David DeAngelo, who holds seminars on dating and puts out CD's on the subject, many men buy into this: http://www.doubleyourdating.com/InterviewSeries/