Lamenting the Abuse of Handicapped Parking Spots

This is an issue that I feel very strongly about. I'll probably offend a few people with this opinion piece, but I honestly don't care. I'm severely disabled, which is why the topic of handicapped parking so substantially resonates with me. We have the tag in our van. I'm confined to a wheelchair. However, I wouldn't say that I need handicapped parking spots. "Need" is a word that people carelessly throw around. I may not be able to walk, but my electric wheelchair drives fairly quickly and it never takes me too much time to reach a door. I would gladly give up a handicapped parking spot for someone with a pronounced limp or someone in a manual wheelchair.

I see countless people parked in handicapped spots that I would not concede to. The first group of people that I'll be targeting is overweight people. I'm not referring to those who are morbidly obese; I'm talking about Jack Black-sized folks who consider themselves to be disabled. Maybe their doctor sees something that I don't. Maybe they have a heart condition. Maybe. These people park in handicapped spots at shopping malls so that they don't have to walk very far to the food court entrance. When they arrive at the food court, they will make two laps around the plaza settling on a restaurant. After they eat, they will shop at the mall for the next three hours, which involves a great deal of walking.

I don't have anything against overweight people. I don't care that they are plus-sized. I don't think any less of them for having laden meat on their bones. But some of them need the exercise. Why are we coddling overweight people by limiting their physical exertion? In my opinion, they should park the furthest away from whatever building they are entering. I would love to know what guidelines doctors adhere to when determining how "disabled" someone is. While I was eating lunch the other day, I noticed two portly middle-aged women parking in a handicapped spot. It was pouring rain, so they made sure to RUN into the restaurant so as not to get wet. RUN. Apparently, rain cures all ailments.

My point is not to pick on overweight people; my point is to pick on stupid people. I once saw a man walk into McDonald's to order for him and his wife. His wife waited in the car. Of course, they were parked in a handicapped spot and of course, the man did not appear to be handicapped in the slightest. When he came back out with the food in hand, they both ate in the car. In the handicapped parking spot. Clearly, they did not need to park there. Clearly, they could have at least parked somewhere else to eat. Someone who is actually disabled might have needed that spot. They had the tag, so hey, they can do whatever they want.

I pledge that something be done to tether the abuse of handicapped spots. Doctors should use more discretion in handing out these parking pardons. If you whip out the tag, then by God, you better need it. I want to see wheelchairs, walking sticks, crutches, wobbling, trembling, panting, sweating…I want to see misery! The backbreaking irony of it all is that my mother once received a ticket for forgetting to put our tag in the windshield. Oh, bother.