Lie or Lay? Sit or Set? Put Your Verbs to Work

Won't you (sit/set) down so that we can talk about a couple of verbs? Afterwards, you may be so exhausted that you'll want to (lie/lay) down and take a nap.

Those opening sentences with their troublesome verbs illustrate two of the most common usage problems that English speakers face. When do you use sit, and when do you use set? When do you use lie, and when do you use lay? I am combining these two problems in one article, because they both have the same solution.

To set or to lay both mean to put something somewhere. There must be a thing (in English-teacher-speak, a direct object) for you to set, to lay, or to put.

To sit or to lie both mean to make a change in one's posture that does not need a thing after the verb. Or, to translate this simple idea into English-teacher-speak, to set and to lay are transitive verbs (the action of the verb is transferred to the object), while to sit and to lie are intransitive verbs (there is no object to which the action is transferred).

So, let's look at my introductory sentences again:

Won't you (sit/set) down so that we can talk about a couple of verbs?
Afterwards, you may be so exhausted that you'll want to (lie/lay) down and take a nap.

Neither sentence has an object, a noun following the verb. Since both sentences refer, instead, to a change in your posture, you will sit down and lie down.

Look at these sentences:
I want you to (sit/set) the bottle of arsenic onto the table.
Then, I want you to (lie/lay) the anaconda onto the divan.

Both of these sentences refer to things (bottle, anaconda) to which the action is transferred. With all four sentences, try replacing the troubling verb with to put, another "transitive" verb (a verb that has to have an object).

Won't you put down so that we can talk about a couple of verbs?
Afterwards, you may be so exhausted that you'll want to put down and take a nap.
I want you to put the bottle of arsenic onto the table.
Then, I want you to put the anaconda onto the divan.

The last two sentences make sense, because the verbs to set, to lay, and to put all need objects to which the action is transferred. The first two sentences make no sense, although in recent years we have developed the slang expression, "to insult." Let's see if even that makes sense:
Won't you insult so that we can talk about a couple of verbs?
Afterwards, you may be so exhausted that you'll want to insult and take a nap.

No, because the verb to insult itself must have an object:
If you insult her anaconda, she will be angry.

An added problem with lie/lay comes up in the past tense, because the past tense of to lie is lay, while the past tense of to lay is laid:
Afterwards, you were so exhausted that you lay down and took a nap.
Later, you laid the anaconda onto the divan.

The verbs to sit and to set are not quite as confusing. The past tense of to sit is sat, but the past tense of to set is set.

Can you put all of this together to make sense of these sentences?

1. Do not (lie/lay) on the antique carpet.
2. I asked Sara to (lie/lay) the shingles.
3. They (lay/laid) the puppy on its bed.
4. The puppy (lay/laid) there without whimpering.
5. My cousins (lay/laid) on the beach all day.
6. She did not tell us where she (lay/laid) the newspaper.

7. Forrest Gump (sat/set) on the bench, talking to anyone who would listen.
8. I don't want you to (sit/set) here bothering me all day.
9. Martin (sat/set) the dumbbells onto the terrazzo floor.
10. The papers (sat/set) on the desk until the wind blew them away.
11. Amber (sits/sets) her laptop computer on the desk every morning.
12. The gardener (sat/set) her tools onto the picnic table.

To check your work, you can either go back and find which sentences have direct objects, or you can re-write the sentence to use a form of to put. The present tense of to put is put, and the past tense is also put. If the sentence has a direct object (a noun after the verb) or if you can substitute a form of to put, then you need a form of to lay or to set.

For lie/lay, 2 (shingles), 3 (puppy), and 6 (newspaper) have objects or could use a form of the verb to put.

For sit/set, 9 (dumbbells), 11 (computer), and 12 (tools) have objects or could use a form of the verb to put.

So, the answers are:

1. lie
2. lay
3. laid
4. lay
5. lay
6. laid

7. sat
8. sit
9. set
10. sat
11. sets
12. sat

You may have noticed an extra clue. If the word onto is used after the verb, you need a form of to lay or to set, because you are putting something onto a surface. If you have the word on, you need form of to sit or to lie, because you are moving your body on a surface.