Life as a Naval Academy Girlfriend

Dating is hard. Dating someone attending the Naval Academy, or the other service academies for that matter, is next to insanity. So why do hundreds of girls and guys go through the heartache of dating an Academy student? No, it is not masochism, just plain old-fashioned true love, made all the more attractive by, of course, the uniform, and the life lived to higher ideals.

I started dating my now-husband the summer after his "plebe" or freshman year. That summer started off a long series of good-byes that continue today. Since we did not start dating until after his first year, I did not get to experience life dating a plebe. Let me give you the general idea: plebes are stuck in Annapolis for the entire school year, excepting Thanksgiving, Winter and Spring Breaks. Their schedules are exceedingly regulated, and while they can communicate with the outside world, they do not have a lot of extra time to do so. Johannah McCammant, whose boyfriend just finished his plebe year, gave me some insight into the difficulties and the rewards of dating a first year academy student: "Plebe year was extremely intimidating. Randy and I had been together for three years before the Academy. I remember the first time I went on the yard [campus] with Randy's family and him, and he met a firstie [senior, or First Class] and the firstie asked him if I was his girlfriend. He said yes, and the firstie told Randy that he had a girlfriend during Plebe year...but they went their separate ways after that. I remember while he was telling Randy this story I was hanging onto his hand for dear life, in some way trying to tell him that that wasn't going to be us. Well, obviously it wasn't, but the year did not come without its challenges. There were times I wondered if this was really what I wanted for myself, but at the end of the day, I knew I wouldn't have it any other way. In many ways we've become closer to each other, but at the same time more of our own person, a chance to develop into who we are, but still able to lean on each other across the miles."

Finally plebe year ends, and there is a wonderful summer break to spend together-or not! Each summer at the Naval Academy, the Midshipmen (or mids) are required to go on two summer cruises. These are typically two or three weeks long, and are anything from sailing a 40foot sailboat from Annapolis to Rhode Island, or going out to Pearl Harbor to ride a sub, or a program where they spend a week each on a sub, flying, and experiencing life as a Marine (Marine officers graduate from the Naval Academy, as the Marine Corp is a department of the Navy). These trips vary in level of communication available, obviously. Then, of course, there is summer school for those who need to catch up, or perhaps want to get ahead. So, summer vacation turns out not to be the three months of bliss it was in high school, and perhaps still is for normal college students. In addition to all these things cutting into their summer, mids have more weeks of class than most colleges, so they are generally out last, and then have to stay two more weeks for briefs, ceremonies, parades, and graduation. Then they are the first to go back in mid-August.

Many college students torture their roommates by having their significant other constantly in the room, even sleeping over. This is not an issue at the Naval Academy, because civilians are not even allowed in the building that houses the dorm rooms for all four-thousand students. In the three years I dated my husband, I only ever saw pictures of his dorm room, and the models built to let the public see how the mids live. There are a couple places mids can hang out with their civilian significant others, particularly Drydock in Dahlgren Hall, but do not count on any privacy.

For all these tough aspects of dating a mid, there are many fun ones too. Attending a Navy football game will make even the most anti-sports girly-girl love the game. Watching four-thousand students in uniform jumping and cheering in unison is heartwarming and thrilling. There are many dances, such as homecoming in the Fall. The Academy also hosts many big name musicians and bands to which mids can bring friends, usually for a fairly cheap ticket price. Significant others are sometimes invited to a "dining out", a formal night out for a company (about 130 mids from every grade level). Then junior (Second Class) year there is ring dance in May. I was unfortunately unable to attend my husband's so I cannot give you a personal account, but basically it is a very formal affair steeped in ceremony regarding the dedication of the mid's class ring. Also in May there are parades, ceremonies, a Blue Angels show, and at the end of it all, graduation.

Better than all these events and experiences is the simple joy and overwhelming pride of seeing your significant other sacrifice normal life for his or her country, and getting to be a small part of the awesome institutions that are the US military academies. If you are with your mid through graduation, you will get to see an awesome sight: almost 1000 of America's best pledging to uphold the Constitution of the United States, with the person you love among them.