Living with Autism in the Family

There is a lot of information going around about Autism. I wanted to share my experiences as the father of an autistic child.

Regardless of why you or people think a child has autism, the reality is there are many families around the world dealing with Autism. There are a couple of key things to do if you think that your child is on the Autism Spectrum. Try and diagnose developmental delays as early as possible. Take note if your doctor says that your child is delayed in activities that they should be doing. Every kid is different so there is some leeway as to when kids should be crawling, walking, talking, and other developmental milestones. I guess where we noticed something was wrong was when there was a pattern of delay that kept getting longer. For instance, she crawled 3 months late, walked 4 months late and there was a progression of each milestone was getting missed by a greater amount of time. She wouldn't acknowledge you when you called her name or pay much attention to you. She would organize toys instead of playing with them. She would have self-injurious behaviors like biting herself on the wrists.

One key thing is to build a good team around you. Find a doctor that works with special needs clients such as Autism, ADHD and other disorders. They can be a helpful advocate. The school, county, state or special needs clinics can be great resources. Tap into those resources ASAP, because they can take months to years to get into. Be willing to try variety of therapies since all kids react different to them. What works for one kid may not work for another. Also, many companies will have Autism exclusions in their insurance policies. Sadly, this is legal depending on how they setup their insurance plan. In most cases you will have to go through your county or state insurance plan like Medical Assistance.

Be leery of people saying they have the surefire cure. There are a lot of good resources out there and a lot more bad ones. People will have plenty of advice for you so take it with a grain of salt as well. Nothing bugs me more than somebody giving me advice who hasn't lived through it.

Finally, there can be a lot of guilt and shame around having a special needs child. You second guess yourself, wonder if you did something wrong that caused this. Try and avoid this, it will only make things worse. There is hope and you can embrace the struggles and grow stronger from them.

So if your child has Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), Asperger syndrome or one of the other pervasive developmental disorders (PDD). Don't hesitate to look for help. Time is critical and the earlier you catch it and treat it the better chance you have of sending your child on to a more full and productive life.