Losing Faith in the Doctor's Today

October began as any other with exception that I was starting to hurt. About an inch to the right (my right), of the spine I began to feel stabs all the way through to the front of my abdominal area. Saturday morning, my best bartend shift of the week, I hurt so badly that I have to cover my shift and head to the local emergency room. By the time they make it to my room to examine me, the pain was all over, front to back, back to front. The diagnosis: ovaries covered in cysts. Monday morning I call the referral and make the appointment to get this fixed. The gynecologist sees me and says my pain is too high. "It must be the kidneys." he says. So from here I am referred to a Internal Medicine doctor. "The pains location falls similar to kidney stones. Let's get some urine and see if that's it." All is done and there is no blood in my urine. Therefore I am sent to another clinic to get an ultrasound for stones. The only thing the ultrasound gets is ovaries full of cysts. The pain continues to get worse. My wonderful doctor sends me away to a Gastrointestinal doctor to find the stones. From cameras down the throat, and cameras up the boat some biopsies were taken and I left shaken. I finally ask him about the Barrett's esophagus, and without looking at my file he tells me, "Yours is so small, there's nothing we can do. We will do another endoscopy once a year to see if anything changes."
Now we are rolling right around Christmas, when the lab calls to tell me the results of my biopsy. "Ma'am, I am sorry to inform you that you have Barrett's Esophagus. It is now inevitable that in 2 to 5 years, you will have cancer." Wow, I cried. Between my son and Christmas, I didn't expect this. She explained that Barrett's esophagus is where your flap between your stomach and your esophagus does not work. Therefore my stomach acids were coming into my esophagus. My body naturally tries to fight it producing those fighter cells which are preliminary cancer. I also get to add Acid Reflux, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Hiatus Hernia, and reddening/ thickening of my stomach walls to my Christmas list.
Of course I failed to mention that in November, I had quit my job. The pain got so bad in my back, I couldn't work a full shift. I went from 60 hours a week to sitting at home staring down the walls. The pain strikes in my chest when it comes, that I ask the doctor what I could do. He prescribes me Xanax and sends for more tests. My next was to be the Hyda- scan. This is where they cleanse your gallbladder, and it then goes to your liver. Then comes the radiation injection. Then you lay back for an hour or so and watch it glow. From your gallbladder to liver you'll see, yellow on the screen. "All looks well so far," the technician says. Yeah! All except for my gallbladder that should be tear shaped is the mirror image of a dime! Calming back down, it's time to drain to my liver. Oh! Wait, it doesn't want to drain. "Maybe you have a stone clogging your gallbladder Ms. LaPointe," the tech says again. This test is based purely on a mathematical equation system to see to what percent your gallbladder works. Monday my Gastro doctor should have the results.
Monday at last and results are in. Yes, baby, yes! Let's get this pain out of me once and for all. Good old Gastro doctor tells me it's at 72%, and it has to be below 35% to remove. He's cutting my pain medication and treats me like a fool. I am making it all up in his eyes, and he has given up. February is finally the month, and after doctors visits 3 and 4 times a week, I too have given up. A friend referred me to a new doctor because the stir crazed person I have become is about to kill my relationship. I am over experienced and still hurting to get a job.
This doctor I do meet. I love him right off. He appears to understand me and know about all my conditions. I get an anti- depressant, xanax upped, taken off of some useless medicines and put on some new ones. My pain medication is at 4 a day. The new doctor understands and gives me some of these too. All seems good for the moment. The pain is tolerable, and I am feeling better. There's only one problem, I can't focus on a danged thing. I make another appointment to up my anti- depressant thinking this will be solved. I get to the doctor, and things have changed. My back got intolerable the night before and I must let the doctor know. I get into his office to get the surprise of my life. Instead of upping my medication, he tells me, "You're becoming quite the junky. I'm going to give you some Adderall. As well being, I am going to cut your pain meds. You are taking too many, so we will drop you from four to one." He refers me to a pediatric orthopedic and touches my back, twice.
Now I am back to giving up on doctor's all again. The Adderall that made me a junkie or the pain pills, helped me and never once did I abuse my medications. And I didn't ask to be put on these! So here I am just happy to have something to where I can write and focus again. The medication is working. I feel like me again, overlooking the fact that my back is still stuck with a knife.
Sunday and out of pain pills my back pain is going into my leg. I make dinner and come to sit down. My thigh jerked on me to what felt like the bone ripped out of my hip. The pain tripled, and I couldn't do shit! Monday morning I am in yet worse pain. I call the doctor asking for a three day early release of my pain pills and explain my pain. They call back and said "Ms. LaPointe the doctor said he would not let you get your pain medication early." Snootily and snot-nosed she talked to me. I explained that was fine. I'd do my best. Around five o'clock yesterday, a neighbor came by. We visited for awhile, and she seen I was in pain and left. In five minutes the pain ran through my whole body, from my back to my thigh and toes. I screamed and cried. I was paralyzed. I called my boyfriend to tell him my pain. I needed an ambulance but couldn't get to the door to unlock it. He leaves work and comes to my aide.
He has to carry me down the steps to the car. We rush off straight to the E.R. There's cars all blocking the front of the doors, so he has to take to the parking lot. There is no parking with exception to three blocks away! Again he carried me until a security officer seen him and called for a mobile. Two security guards and my boyfriend put me in the van. I am screaming and crying in the worst pain of my life. Yes! Worse than child birth. My left leg I cannot move and sends sharp pains. My whole body is being stabbed again and again.
Most of this visit was a blur to me. What I know is that everyone in the hospital heard me and they shot me up quick. Running me for x-rays, and doing all they could. I finally could quit crying and screaming. The pain was going away. Four hours later, they come and they say, "Ms. LaPointe, your pain in your back, hip, and leg is called Sciatica. This means that something has happened to your spine, and this and that nerves are being pinched and causing the pain. The discharge me and stress how important it is that I see my doctor within 42 hours.
This morning I woke up, another day of pain. I made the call to my doctor's office to schedule it for an emergency follow- up. I kindly tell them that I had gone last night and what they had found. I am not a spiteful person. I don't abuse my prescriptions. And I definately know when something is wrong with my body. Five months of pain, and now we are getting somewhere. The last I seen my doctor he made me feel bad, cut my meds, added another controlled substance instead. All this evening I have researched sciatica and found there are very few causes that make this happen. The causes of this "symptom" are: Herniated disc, spinal stenosis, bone spurs, nerve root compression, and tumors. Finally we are getting close to finding out what is wrong with me. I left the doctor's office March 18th is finally going to be over soon.
Tomorrow I go to see the same doctor to talk to him on a few matters. First off on my Delin-tude list: Does he want to continue to be my doctor or does he want out. Then I am going to explain to him that I am not a junkie and when I say something is wrong with me, it had better be checked out. I never took narcotics until my back started to hurt, not even in the military when my hip, pelvis, and fibular broke. Then if he choose to treat me with respect and not dismiss my condition; we shall plan what to do to start finding the root of my problems in my spine.
I don't know why I wrote this article tonight. I am not here to teach you about medical conditions. I am here to inspire those who know that something is wrong, don't sit back like me and just take what the doctor says. Keep going and going until they find out what is wrong. After yesterday I wasn't even sure I'd ever walk again. Don't let a doctor bully you and make you feel bad. It's not worth the pain you will feel when your body is hurt. Don't put it off, getting checked out.
I am mad at my doctor, yes. He should've at least x-rayed me. Tomorrow will be more of a business meeting than a visit. However, one way or another, things will get set straight. I hope and pray I do not lose my temper. The trained soldier in me can be as sneaky and deadly in the tongue as in the hand. Tomorrow I could be on a search for a new doctor. I do know that somehow I will come out feeling better. Either he will know now I am not a junkie, or he will release me to a new doctor where I can get the relief I so badly crave.
Wish me luck tomorrow. I pray that I keep my patience and get what I need.