Love: the Wonder Drug

There are thoughts of eternity in the human heart. The fight against time, via supplements, health and beauty aids is strong evidence that we desire to live long. However, the most overlooked and underestimated life-extender is right under our noses, literally. Humans themselves have the elixir of life. It is within their own heart.

All human beings require the tender touches, gentle strokes and the reassurance of unconditional love. These draw out pain, provide internal security, create a safe zone for creativity [learning], to reach their greatest potential. A scrapped knee, a dead goldfish, hurt feelings...all made a little better by the loving care of a mother. A child doesn't care how much you know, only how much you care. And that unconditional love tells them how much you care. This is more likely to produce an adult that cares for others.

If the arch-type of unconditional love is mom, dad's is the foundation. He plays rough and tumble, building trust in their father's strength. Physical, hands-on activity like horseback rides add a great sense of security. Being a father I try not to take it personally that my children run to mom first, but I admit I am a bit jealous at times. However, I have grown comfortable with each of our tendencies ands strengths. Rather than oppose each other, the opposites attract. This creates a nice balance for children.

Oxytocin is a hormone produced by men and women after copulation. Immediately after, these hormone levels move to nearly the same levels, in both men and women. The same people exposed to this hormone but faced with a computer, did not show increased willingness to take risks, and specifically affected an individual's willingness to accept social risks, arising through interpersonal interactions. It is hardly surprising that Oxytocin is also known as the "cuddle" hormone -- released by both men and women at sexual orgasm. It also causes a substantial increase in trusting behavior and causes a release of soothing and pain killing endorphins.

It is possible that the mechanism by which altruistic love affects health occurs through blocking or attenuating the stress response, or through activating positive neurotransmitter pathways in the brain. Conversely, loneliness breeds congestive heart failure. Just as nature abhors a vacuum, a lack of love can lead to a collapse within; like a black hole, not even light can escape. There appears to be some point of no return.

Love and intimacy are at the root of what makes us sick and what makes us well. If a new medication had the same impact, failure to prescribe it would be considered malpractice. Connections with other people affect not only the quality of our lives but also our survival. Study after study find that people who feel lonely are many times more likely to get cardiovascular disease than those who have a strong sense of connection and community. I'm not aware of any other factor in medicine-not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery-that has a greater impact on our quality of life, incidence of illness and premature death.

In one study at Yale, men and women who felt the most loved and supported had substantially less blockage in their coronary arteries. Similarly, researchers from Case Western Reserve University studied almost 10,000 married men and found that those who answered "yes" to this simple question-"Does your wife show you her love?"-had significantly less angina (chest pain). And when researchers at Duke surveyed men and women with heart disease, those who were single and lacked confidants were three times as likely to have died after five years. In all three studies, the protective effects of love were independent of other risk factors. Plus surgery patients experienced quicker recoveries.

During the time ancient times and for 95% of human history, women have been under the subjection, domination and tyranny of men. That's the way of the ancient, non-Christian civilizations. It was not until Jesus and the New Testament that women were, of course, worthy to be talked to, treated with tenderness and love and not treated as a sexual, disposable object. When God created man, He saw that Adam needed some help (Gen. 2:20). Adam, being first created, was put to sleep and had a rib removed, to be placed, symbolically, to be next to the original location of that rib. Next to the man. This meant that they were co-equal in rights, as heirs, as children of God, but that since God made the many in marriage, "bone of my bones [ie, the two ribs from each side], and flesh of my flesh" and "together they became one flesh"... or couple or spouses. And if one flesh on one body, then these need only one head.

Wives are given only 4 verses to abide by (Eph. 5:22-24) while the man is given 9 verses. "Wives, submit yourselves unto your husbands, as unto the Lord. Meaning if it is decidedly breaking God's laws (ie, order your wife to murder or steal, etc.), she does not have to submit, only in those things "in the Lord". This means God has compelled men to have this responsibility in the minor to major, life-changing decisions. Now any good husband would naturally want to counsel with his wife before doing anything on a major scale. This is out of respect, and the wife may be right in her objections. Men must accept that having the right does not equal demanding the right...even when they know they're wrong. Even so, wives most often quoted request is to simply be loved, so love them. The man's greatest need is identified in the bible. Is it is that she respects her husband (Eph. 5:33). That, too a man, equals love. Men must be willing to love her, just as much as Christ loved the church and be willing to even die for her. That is your responsibility. Biblically, she is not required to sacrifice her life for yours, but you are (Eph. 5:25-33)!

Pets are just like our own children. No doubt this is nearly universal. Good for us, since owning one lowers blood pressure, extends lifespan, boosts mood, provides humor, releases pain killing and mood elevating endorphins, and just plain provide companionship. They don't care how bad things went at work. They just care you are home. It is not surprising that animals are excellent in reaching and connecting with people; mentally disabled, autistic children and even juvenile delinquents, whom many grew up angry, being themselves deprived of love. Animals are therapeutic to both patient and owner; horses, cats, dogs, birds. My shadow is my black cat, Midnight Black, the most affectionate I have ever seen and exactly what we needed since out "Reddy" of 20 years passed away this year.

Love is intangibles; feelings of security, acceptance, love, affection. Love is also tangible, such as actions that provide evidence of love. It is not just a feeling or being in an emotional state. Love endures much and last forever once a relationship is initiated. As a husband, father and now grandfather (X3), when I do the dishes, bring some flowers, do a load of laundry, changing the litter box, leave little notes of appreciation, etc., I fulfill what love is: A verb. It's what you do!

The interesting thing is, the more you give away, the more you receive. It is impossible to give away too much, nor can you ever receive too much. God gave His only Son because He loves us. Jesus, who is God, came as man to die to redeem us. So God the Father sent Jesus (also God), to die on the Cross for simple creatures like us so we can live forever with Him Who has always existed. We were so lost and impossibly separated from God, that one of the Triune Gods (Jesus) had to come and die for us. Wow! That's love in action! Actions do speak louder than words, or feelings, or emotions.

There is a definite physiochemical connection between being loved and living longer, healthier lives, and that loss of love can lead to lose of life. After long lives together, a spouse will often follow their deceased mate in a relatively short time. There is a strong connection to love and health and the number of years lived. It truly is a "wonder drug" since love can extend the years a person lives. Same goes for pets. I have been abundantly inoculated for life. If Mr. Spock were 100% logical, he might say to the captain, "love long and prosper". That is my hope for you. Even more, become a child of God, accept Jesus and live forever by following the adoption process.

I Admit - that I am a sinner and in need of a Savior (Rom 6:23)

I Abandon - self-effort and realize I can not be saved by my works or efforts (Acts 16:31)

I Accept freely Christ's payment for my sins, required of the Father. (John 3:16)

I Acknowledge Jesus Christ as my personal lord and Savior (Acts 4:12)

If you have just received Jesus, you have now received God's inheritance rights since you
are now a son or daughter of His and can never be lost again & live forever (John 10:28-29).