Loving People Through the Ages

I could go on and on with things I don't like about people. From the guy that drives the beat up Bronco in my town who is well known for yelling obscenities at all other drivers, to the well-to-do witch (that I don't know) who said to me last week in a line, "Gawwd, isn't that hat a little hot for Florida? (Okay, if I want to wear my winter hat in 70 degree weather, what does she care? And what was the point? Really?) Believe me; I encounter people on a daily basis that could make me check out on the human race altogether, we all do. Thankfully, there are others, to offset this vicious brood.

All throughout life actually, from birth till death, there are moments of awe that touch our spirits in a way nothing on earth can. And there is usually a person at the heart of each one. Yes, people of all ages consistently remind us that life is worth living. And if we take a moment to notice, this race - the human race becomes a daily victory.

Number 1: Innocence of an Infant
To hold a baby and realize for the first time how fragile an innocent human life begins, is as endearing as it is frightening. This is definitely the number one thing I love about people...the littlest, most innocent ones that remind us of a vulnerable new start with every breath - and really a grand foreshadowing of how people need people right from the start.

Number 2: Intelligence of a Toddler
I know I am not the only one who has ever been blown away at a toddler's intelligence or the capacity of child prodigy. It is unbelievable to conceptualize the power of the human brain to absorb and knit together random information. There are so many kinds of intelligence, but when you come face to face with someone that doesn't even realize (a small child) how fascinating the brain is, but can exercise it perfectly - it blows your mind! The capacity to amaze with the mind is a stimulating thing to witness and one of the most magical moments on earth.

Number 3: Forgiveness of a Child
Forgiveness is something that seems to be less present with age. This is why the number three spot belongs to kids. Yes, ages 3 - 10 are perhaps the most naturally forgiving people in the world, laying their little hearts out to be loved on or mutilated over and over. Having 4 kids under the age of 13, I see this almost every day, their ability to truly forgive and open their hearts once more. It is perhaps the best thing about any person...and is a crown worn by school age children who anti-up trust without a grudge in the shadow.

Number 4: Dare of a Teenager
Teenagers win the number 4 spot with a little thing I love about people called: stupidity! I say that in total love, but what I really mean is the ability to dare! I am consistently amazed by how willing they can be to make a total fool of themselves, totally daring in nature...and have fun doing it.

Adults tend to shy away from being fools at all costs. Teenagers don't seem to care. After all, they are going to live forever and no consequence is going to touch them (sarcasm). But it just gives adults so much to talk about - these phases. In addition, as we look back on our teenage years, there are 1,000 things we did that we would never do now. And if asked if we would change any of it...would we? (I would exclude the conscientious teenager than helps move mountains, but even they probably risked foolish failure to do so!) Bottom line, there is something totally cool about "follow your gut" enthusiasm!

Number 5: Love of a Wedding
If a wedding is extravagant or done on a dime, it never fails to deliver the soul of the bride - and in some instances, the couple. GOSH, I love a wedding. You have this couple in love, committing their life with dreams on the wind, binding it all with a ring...and happy as they ever might be. Weddings are a total reflection of hope and trust and who the couple is...from location, to cake, to tux. In one afternoon, no ones dreams could be totaled better than on their wedding day, for all to see and support with a smile. (And for the record in some way, a wedding is always proof that people are NUTS..in some way!)

Number 6: Party/Failure in the 20's
The 20's are a very "follow your heart" enthusiastic group...and they make the world go round in many ways...namely via party and failure. If you don't think people love people for failure...go to an AA meeting! People love a good failure because everyone can relate to it. And sadly, a serious failure of sorts always occurs in the 20's.

Maybe you didn't go to college, got a DUI, got married and divorced, had the "oops" baby, had a little "check-out-of life-illegal-drug stint"...whatever it is, failure escapes no man...and tends to find every man in their 20's. I adore this about the 20's. It's a shake your head, cryin' shame...but for God sakes, you have your whole life ahead of you. And something about that is refreshing and relatable. In fact, it's kind of where your real story begins, through failure. Failure makes people interesting. Period. And for the record, this usually all comes wrapped up in a very fun package called "The Party Years!" Wooo hooo. People love to party and party people are just fun, darn it! (If you don't believe me, go ask someone in their 20's.)

Number 7: Reality of the 30's and 40's
Need I say more? But...I truly believe reality sets in for most men (and women) in their 30's. And something about that is calming, happy and maybe a little boring at times. The 30's are what make people REAL. They've lived long enough to screw things up a little, and yet may have encouraging victories to rely in their arsenal of tricks. But more, self image takes a turn in the 30's as reality sets in...and you find yourself saying things like, "I'm getting old....yuck!" It is a loss and a reality check and in ways, the 30's separate the men from the boys. But any way you cut it, the REALITY is there...you can do things your younger self could do...but should you? I mean, you're getting kinda old for that crap. And do you really even enjoy it anymore? Oh my Gosh! You ARE your mom! Yep...reality tends to make people come to one fundamental truth. You are real: damaged, durable and hopeful in a way that you're not sure will really materialize now that you're...over the hill.

Number 8: The Mentor, The Friend - Age 60
At 60 you know who you are. Even more, you know who you're friends are and actually hold the key to what a good friend is. And like it or not, you are probably a mentor to someone...somewhere (often your own children!) Yep, you're getting old and you're done with all childish ways, unless of course you choose to act like a child which you give yourself permission to do regardless of what anyone thinks, because you can. You're 60.

60 is a great place of self realization, confidence and settling - that is why you are so good at advice and friendship. So many doubts have been dispelled and now, you are the "go to" for your parents for heaven's sake. Life goes on...as you watch your parents fall apart (and your kids fall apart) and a huge piece of you just wants to raise your hands and say, "Well, I fought the good fight." But guess what, you have 20 more years.

And THANK GOD...because too many people need you - you are a great friend. I love mentors! WE NEED YOU 60! You haven't lost your mind yet, and you are still connected because 2 of your kids moved back home with their kids. Can you spread yourself thinner? Mentors are a sacrificial bunch that doesn't get near what they deserve and their tireless effort (even though they are tired...because their 60) will receive a crown of diamonds in heaven.

Number 9: The Storyteller (ageless)
I won't put an age to this but, everyone knows a good story generally comes from a little (or a lot) of experience. Someone that can spin a great story with perfect timing is mesmerizing. We all know them, they are the center of work circles in the break room, they are the one everyone wants to sit by at the bar...they are the storyteller.

I love people who can tell a great story. They are the glue of our lives, able to construct the necessary details to keep it fluid, find the comedy, drama or horror of the moment and relate it to anyone listening. It is an art, storytelling. And, you never know where these people will be because this gift does not discern age, money, status or morality...when you're good, you're just good.

Number 10: Memory or Memory Loss
The final thing I love about people most is their memory. Have you ever had someone say, "Remember when..." and you have only a vague idea of what they are talking about? Or...someone says, "Remember when..." and you know exactly what they are talking about and smile ear to ear. But most is how much you learn to value memory when someone loses it.

The last 6 years my grandmother has slowly drifted and her mind isn't as sharp as it once was. It is so hard to watch. It reminds me that death comes for us all. And though I hate this, I leave thinking that life is but a while...so I better get busy living. And when I think of her sitting there, I think of her young self that was....I remember. And I love that I can, that I knew her when...and I am glad to be part of that heritage - of not a people...but of a person that made a difference.

In summary, what do I love about people? It may not be the guy in the Bronco...but that guy is not my world. He's some guy stuck in some bad phase of dysfunction. That is what I chose to believe, so I can let him (and his loud mouth) drive by. Then, I am free to go home, hold my baby, be amazed by my toddler, and ask for forgiveness from my 9 year old to be reminded of what is sweet and pure. I can look on Facebook and shake my head at my nephews (15 and 22), and plan what to wear to that spring wedding on my fridge (I can't wait!) I am in my 30's so reality always finds me, but I can't help from calling my mom, my friend...and I love her, she is my mentor. And when I lay down at night I will smile at something a storyteller told me once. Or I will think of my grandmother and I will love these 10 people - and things I love about them all - over again, as I drift off to sleep.