Madonna as Christ: The Aging Pop Star "Rises" to New Lows

Madonna is no stranger to shock. Whether it's releasing strange books featuring your own naked body or making out with Britney Spears, there is no envelope that Madonna wouldn't push. Many critics are quick to declare her as the most influential female pop star all time. I just think that "Like a Prayer" is a kick ass song (as were her albums "Bedtime Stories" and half of "Ray of Light"). I try not to look at musicians as cultural deities, unless they die before the age of 28.

Madonna isn't dead, far from it really. She's kind of toned our image in recent years. It had seemed like the former Material Girl had become the Domesticated Mom. Her husband, Guy Ritchie, is famous for making one good movie that was a rip-off of Pulp Fiction. He's the perfect companion for an egomaniac like Madonna; British and not that famous.

Most of the press that Madonna has gotten lately has usually circulated around three fairly boring jokes; the aforementioned domestication, her nutty obsession with Kabala, and the fact that she now speaks with a British accent. She hadn't stirred the pot in long, long time.

But then Madonna booked a tour; a big fucking tour. The "Confessions" tour is Madonna's first world venture in over two years; and some experts say that it could eclipse the $192 million bucks that Cher's "Farewell Tour" generated. And this is no stripped down, adult contemporary set. This is full on Madonna; complete with a carousel on stage, lots of blinking lights and a recreation of the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. What?

That's right, there are several Christian illusions throughout the program but the kicker happens during the song "Live to Tell". Madonna dons a crown of thorn before the ballad and then is hoisted on a mirrored crucifix and lifted over the crowd; obligatory images of third world poverty and grim statistics are flashed on the giant video screen.

It's all a little much, if you ask me. I'm all for art, even performance art (which is what this is really). I'm not offended by this; I'm not even surprised (I am more surprised that Madonna hasn't used this stunt before, it seems like something she would've done five years). I guess I just don't get it. Are we, as Americans, supposed to rise up and conquer the forces that be, just because a geriatric, expatriate pop star hops on a cross and plays a documentary. Please. If I were Madonna, I'd be far more concerned with the fact that I haven't made a good song since the 90's (don't get me started on her "American Pie" cover).

Madonna didn't stop there either (and, I mean, why should she?). During one of her many costume changes; she inexplicably plays another (shocking) video. This classic juxtaposes images of President Bush, members of his administration and British Prime Minister Tony Blair with footage of Adolf Hitler, Osama bin Laden, and Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe. Ooh, scary. Maybe she is implying that our world leaders are nothing but dictators and terrorists? Give me a fucking break, Madonna. You really have lost it. I don't even know how to begin picking that one apart, so I'm not going to even try. Madonna wants people to get upset because that justifies her art; I get that too.

I'm not upset. I'm not even the least bit offended by any of this. I just find it stupid. In the end, this is just proof that Madonna has nothing left in the tank. Being edgy and cool is one thing; anybody can be that. But being edgy and cool with some awesome melodies and killer beats is damn near impossible; and for Madonna, those days are gone. Why is this? I'm not sure. Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone.