Make Your Decorations Tactful, Not Tacky, During the Holiday Season

Okay, not yet, perhaps, but it will be upon us before we know it. And we all know what that means.

No, I'm not talking about the get-togethers, the laughter, the cheer, the delicious foods, or the presents. I'm not even talking about the horror of holiday shopping. What I am talking about is, (drum roll, please)...holiday decorations.

I am a big fan of festive lights and Christmas trees and pretty sprig wreaths. Nothing makes it feel more like Christmastime than a house nicely lit up with a picture-perfect tree in the window.

But there are too many people out there today that go overboard. Or don't try hard enough. Or are just completely clueless. So it's time for a little Holiday Decoration Etiquette 101.

First of all, look at the type of structure you live in. Your decorations should fit your surroundings. They should compliment your home. Think of decorations as accessories to your house. Would you leave the house with mismatched silver and gold earrings and a neon pink necklace?

Icicle lights have become all the rage in the past several years. EVERYONE has them. And not everyone should. Icicle lights should be reserved for big, Victorian-style houses. Since these houses are so large and grand anyway, they aren't overpowered by dangling lights. Trailers should NOT have icicle lights. This just looks dumb.

Net lights have also become very popular. I personally don't like them because I feel it's cheating. If you're going to decorate then take the time to really decorate, not just drape a net over your shrubbery. But if you, again, live in a large house with a large yard and have a lot of well-groomed bushes, you might be able to pull these off. If your house is located four feet from the sidewalk and you have three pathetic, little shrubs, forget about it.

And here's a tip on lights: No matter what kind you choose, make sure they are either all white, or the mixed color kind. No half-and-half. As far as I'm concerned, mixing white and colored lights together should be illegal. Segregation all the way!

Oh, and make sure they all blink, none blink, and that they all light up. It's so disappointing to see strands of lights that aren't in sync with each other.

Okay, enough about lights. Moving on to the next topic: Lawn decorations. I feel most of them are pretty tacky, but sometimes a very small lawn display is appropriate. There is one thing I must order you to stay away from at all costs, however. I beg and plead with you not to give in and buy one. Or four.

I'm talking about the big, huge, gaudy, blow-up ornaments that come in "Rudolph", "Santa", "Frosty", and "The Grinch". Everyone seems to have one. Or four. And they are the tackiest Christmas lawn ornament ever made in the history of the universe. Under no circumstances do they ever look good. Ever.

So what is appropriate and tasteful when decorating your house? Follow this rule: Less is more. Keep it simple. Don't go crazy. Maybe pick a theme and stick to it.

Large houses always look beautiful with one candle lit in every window, a big wreath with a red bow, and a Christmas tree decorated to the hilt in the front window. It's a classic look that inspires "oohs" and "aahs".

Family-size homes should put up some brightly colored lights on the trim, garland around the porch, and a pretty tree in the window. These homes can get away with a little more because there are usually children residing there. Just try to make things go together.

As for trailers and other small structures, the inside is more important than the outside. Put lights up in the kitchen and living area to make things appear more festive. If you insist on placing something outside, however, one string of lights along the top will suffice.

Follow this advice, and your home will look great during the upcoming holiday season. People will be talking about how tasteful and beautiful it is instead of how they need to wear sunglasses at night to keep from being blinded by the 100,000 light display at your residence.

And if you do give in to the urge to buy one of the blow-up lawn decorations, I might just have to pop it. Consider yourself warned.