Making Christmas Gift Giving Special and Unique

Okay, we've all heard the rants about how Christmas has become so commercialized that it's lost it's true meaning, and how the incessant materialism has overtaken the carols and family gatherings. "Merry Christmas", sadly, has been replaced with "Happy Holidays." It would be easy to become fed up with the whole thing, because it has become so darn impersonal. We base our Christmas gift list on who gave to us last year, and Lord forbid that we should receive a Christmas gift from someone unexpectedly, and not have a gift to exchange with them. So we stash generic Christmas presents into our gift closet, or quickly regift an item that we've received. We feel pressured to give Christmas gifts to everyone, from family and friends, to hairdressers and bug sprayers. And these days, if we just can't find something, we give a plastic gift card. Or if all else fails, they give us money, and we give them money. (Hey, that's not so bad--who can't use money in these tough economic times? I admit I'd rather have dollars than another toaster, potholder, or calendar.) But the truth is, we don't remember those kind of gifts. We can't point to a dollar years later, and say, "Uncle Joe gave that to me for Christmas in 1979."

So what should we do to make Christmas gift giving more meaningful? We all say that we'd rather have a homemade gift, but we had a neighbor when I was young, who insisted on baking cakes for us. (Now, I never met a cake that I didn't like. Well...except hers.) They were so dry that your tongue stuck to the roof of your mouth, and you couldn't swallow. So when we saw Phyllis coming with another Christmas cake, we cleared the decks.

But seriously, if you do have a special talent for painting, flower arranging, quilting, sculpting, pottery making, etc., those are gifts that will last for years, and will remind your friends and family of you, each time they see them. My step-dad had quite a talent for clock making. He died several years ago, and those of us who received a clock from him, will always treasure that gift.

If you are a writer, a poem in a special frame, or a recorded song, or a beautiful message in a bottle, would be a unique and memorable Christmas gift. A scrapbook of childhood or family pictures, or special life events is another thoughtful gift, as is a video tribute to a special person in your life. A romantic Christmas gift might be something similar to what I plan to do for my husband. Do you have a song that you fell in love to--that special one that you call "our song?" I found an old vinyl 45 RPM record of our song by Elvis. It's called, "I Can't Help Falling In Love With You." I am going to have it matted and framed for him for Christmas, as a special memory of our love story.

Sometimes the best gifts I've given, haven't even been planned. They were things that I already owned, that someone admired. It is so much fun just to take off a necklace, and give it to a waitress, or a friend who thinks it's pretty. That is a gift they are not likely to ever forget. Sometimes giving a gift now, instead of saving it for an inheritance, after you've gone, is much more meaningful. So think of that when your daughter, or granddaughter, admires a beautiful piece of your jewelry, or a bone china teacup. My husband gave a gift of his treasured high school baseball glove to a grandson, who is turning out to be quite a baseball star. They love to talk about the sport, and the glove had special meaning.

And don't forget that Christmas presents don't always come in a box. In fact, thinking outside the box at Christmas, is so much fun. Perhaps the gift of an evening out, in a fancy restaurant, decorated in all its Christmas radiance, would thrill a mom who rarely gets a night out. Or special concert tickets, or a season's pass to a stage crafter's group, or the symphony, would be a luxurious Christmas gift for a drama or music lover. If you don't have much money to spend, why not offer to babysit, or help with Christmas errands, decorating, or house cleaning? You could mow the lawn, or cook a nice dinner, or dessert, for a friend or neighbor. These are gifts that make our lives easier, and are so greatly appreciated. Or perhaps a friend could use a little extra spending money for the Christmas season. Treat them to a dinner out, and then give the gift in plenty of time for their Christmas shopping. Be sensitive to people, and to their needs and desires. Sometimes if you're Christmas shopping with a friend or family member, and you see them thrilled over something in the store, it's fun to sneak back in and buy it for them, while they're doing something else.

My cousin, Jack, has a fabulous record collection, and all through the year, I've picked up 45s that I think he might like, when I am in thrift stores or at garage sales. I will also purchase the latest book on collectible records and their current worth, and give the records and the book as Christmas gifts. He will know that I was thinking of him all through the year.

Think of things that mean a lot to family members. When my mom was little, she won a doll in a Shirley Temple contest, because she looked so much like her. The doll has been in our family for years, but its porcelain face had cracked from age. Last Christmas, I got her a similar Shirley Temple doll on Ebay, with the same kind of face and teeth that the original doll had. She loved it, and it was clear that a lot of thought had gone into selecting that gift. When I first met my husband, I worked as a cocktail waitress in the Holiday Inn lounge, where he was singing. One Christmas, he had a doll made that looked just like me, wearing the same outfit as my waitress uniform, complete with my name tag. What an amazingly thoughtful Christmas gift!!! I knew that he didn't just run into Walmart on Christmas Eve, and purchase that one. It's all about knowing the person that you're buying for, and caring enough to spend some time thinking of them, and what would please them for Christmas.

Remember, everyone likes surprises, and the most special Christmas gift is one that has a little thought behind it. It really IS the thought that counts!