Man Selling Life on EBay: The Cost

According to an article on CBS News, a man named Ian Usher in Western Australia has broken up with his wife, and has decided to auction his complete lifestyle on eBay to the highest bidder. This would include his job, friends, home, car, motorcycle, parachute gear, and everything else except for his wallet and passport.

What an interesting idea. Hummm... I have a complete life that I'm not doing much with right now, I wonder if I'm sellable too? Let's see...

I've got a home that was built over 100 years ago, that could maybe be a good selling point. During the summer in my cold climate, it only takes about 50.00 a month to heat. During the winter, there's no way that I can keep it warm and toasty with today's heat prices, so I better mention that somebody who enjoys ice swimming with polar bears might like to live here.

My home is a little dusty around the edges; I had this not-so-brainy idea about having a yard sale, and the leftovers never got put away when my next not-so-brainy idea hit that perhaps I should sell them online. To make a long story short, I couldn't get 'over there' to dust it if my life depended on getting there. Yes! Selling my complete life, just as it is, might be a simply delightful idea.

In another part of my home, I have piles and pile of boxes that my children have asked me to store for them. These children have homes for the boxes to live in, but somehow they feel that those boxes look nicer in my place. Perhaps they'll never miss them if I decide that my life has an auction value. I can maybe call that mess my 'Mystery Pile Bonus' while the ad is running.

Oh, dear. The cat can't be left with some stranger taking over my life; that will never work. She doesn't like strangers, and runs to hide when somebody new comes in. With my luck, she'd run off to hide and the stranger would never know that she was in here until it was too late to worry about feeding her every day. I need to keep the cat. Uh... and the houseplants, my tax records, my computer files, my favorite coffee mug....

... the coffee maker, my quilts, the children's baby books, the photos, the camera, the darkroom, all of my painting supplies, leather working tools, cookbooks, the cute leather jacket, my favorite hoola-hoop (long story), maybe the desk, table, dresser, a few shelves for the plants to sit on, some wall hangings, the handmade rugs, the big green storage cupboard....

...cat food dishes and boxes, mixer, cookie jar, printer, fax, scanner, 8 track players and spare parts, 8 track tapes, records, cassettes, radio, television? - No, the television can be upgraded later, it can stay...

Ian!!! Stop!!! What are you thinking??? We can't sell our lives on eBay!!!

According to the news article, you want more than the high-end value of your house, a sum over 390,000 from the auction. If you click here and go to an eBay auction calculator, your fees for a 390,000 sale on eBay are 7,481.90. In other words, if you want to walk away with 400,000 in your wallet, your life needs to sell for 408,000.

At 408,000 for a home that is worth 350,000 means that you expect to get 58,000 for your used car, used motorcycle, used parachute gear, whatever furniture you were left with in the divorce, and your clothing. I just can't see that happening. Your job is a no-sell point. If nobody bids on the auction, and you leave, a qualified person will take your place without having to pay for the job.

The news article claims that you plan to walk away with all of that money in your wallet and use your passport to fly away on whatever the next flight happens to be to start your new single life. Do you think that divorced people have the luxury of finding another home and job easily? If so, you're wrong.

When you leave a job because of divorce, you become unstable looking on your resume. While married you have home responsibilities that employers assume will keep you coming back every day. You lose that edge in the job market as soon as you claim to be single. Without job security, finding a home is going to be hard; worse yet if your plane happens to be coming to America. Our job and home situation here is anything but stable.

Legally, you probably have obligations to your ex-wife; if you owe her alimony, I wouldn't count on any judge being sympathetic towards you choosing to give up your stable way of life. Here in America when money is owed, it is owed despite your circumstances. If your ex-wife feels that you are not trying, she will do like I did, and ask the court to bring you back home to explain yourself - even from two continents away.

Whisper to me so that nobody else hears... Ian? Did you hide anything during divorce or before this sale? Uh-Huh. I do understand human nature. But, where is your baseball card collection from your childhood? You are promising your complete life on eBay. Are you ready for a strange buyer to be exploring all of those nooks and crannies at your Mothers house? If somebody wins your life, they'll be looking for what you have hidden.

Many years ago when I got divorced, somebody sat me down and explained life. I had to come up with a budget instantly, and I had to stay realistic about what that budget would cover. How far do you think your 400,000 will go if you can't find a job or housing quickly? And, can't get credit cards because of divorce and changing countries?

Assuming that you plane lands at LAX in Los Angeles, California, you will be looking at a cheap little rental house costing about 4,000 a month. A used car will be another 5,000, new clothing will be about 3,000, stocking the kitchen with pots, pans, and food another 2,500 and you need a bed for another 1,000. Right there you have used 35,500 in the first six months; 37,600 if you pay garbage and get a television.

If you land in Hong Kong, you can triple your cost of 37,600 for six months into 112,800. You will have to move fast to find a job and permanent housing before you run out of money. If you are really planning to be surprised about your destination, as you are setting up your new budget before you leave home, plan to be in a country that does not speak your language. Jobs and houses are harder to find with language barriers.

Ian, I think that you are making a horrible mistake. What you need from the auction and what you will actually get from the auction, do not appear to be enough money for you to romantically run off to the end of the earth to start over again. I do not know a thing about Australia taxes, but they probably get a chunk of whatever you make and that needs to be averaged into this equation, too.

Perhaps, you would have better luck in starting a new life if you keep your old life intact, and try running an ad at a dating service instead of eBay?