Marriage and Shared Responsibilities

Marriage is a relationship that involves sharing of responsibilities. When two consenting adults vow "to have and to hold" each other; they also agree to handle all challenges that would come their way. Sharing is one very important aspect of marriage, because it is a partnership in which each one is expected to have an equal obligation of all things shared. They should also find time to be together and share each other's thoughts, concepts, and feelings. These would strengthen their bond and bring them closer together.

What are the things that married couples do together? One primary activity that should be shared is a quite time in each other's company. One successful couple I know spent at least one hour together everyday. They talked about nothing in particular but just shared their thoughts and what transpired during the day.

They also talked about their plans for the morrow. They talked about the things that they had problems with. They shared their visions and their dreams with each other. Couples who did this usually had a lasting relationship because they understood each other more.

Agreement on responsibilities should be respected. They should have a common understanding on who takes care of each of the various responsibilities that come with marriage. When responsibilities are shared, there is a sense of belongingness and oneness that would make the marriage stronger.

Financial obligation is one of these. A clear agreement would avoid misunderstandings that could arise from this aspect. There are lots of marriages which have gone sour because of monetary disagreements. It should be made clear who pays for this and that bill.

Household chores should also be shared. Who should cook? Who should iron the clothes? Who should wash the dishes? These may seem trivial but when these are coupled with work related stress and pressure, they can be taxing.

Couples should help each other out in this aspect. They would discover the joy of doing the dishes together, of the happiness of being able to cook food together.

Rearing children is a great, shared responsibility - the greatest of all. Since they had willingly consented to procreation and literally "made" their children together, they should also be willing to share in the enormous task of taking care of their children.

What a wonderful family it would be, when the mother and father agrees to commit themselves in sharing in the gargantuan task of bringing up their kids in an atmosphere of mutual sharing and love.