Marshmallow Popper May Be Best Toy Ever

Inquistr.com lists the Marshmallow Popper as one of its "Interesting Christmas Gift" ideas for this year. And no wonder. You see, the Marshmallow Popper is a marshmallow gun. That's right, folks. It shoots marshmallows. Who doesn't want to hit their little sister in the head with a marshmallow on Christmas morning?

Yeah, I had never thought of it, either. But think of all the possibilities! As I mentioned, you can hit your little sister in the head with a marshmallow! Then you two can fight over who gets to eat it. Just make sure you give it a good look to make sure it didn't pick up any cat hair on the floor.

Mad at Dad because he won't let you stay up to watch TV all night? The Marshmallow Popper is the answer. If you hit him with a marshmallow, what is he going to do? Get mad? No, he's going to eat the marshmallow. The marshmallow popper lets you get out your aggression without making Dad get out the belt.

Sure, some will say it's an inane toy, and the plastic could much better be used to make pacemakers. But those people have obviously never tasted a marshmallow.

Another plus with the Marshmallow Popper: the element of surprise. Hit your unsuspecting victim with a marshmallow, and they won't know what to think. "What? Marshmallow? Is this an act of aggression, or a tasty treat? Whatever shall I do?"

Things to watch out for: marshmallows are sticky. Don't shoot one and then forget about it. This could lead to a really sticky carpet, or a really sticky cat.

Too many marshmallows will make you sick. Take it from a man that ate an entire box of Peeps in an hour. Learn from my mistake.

Shooting a girl and telling her you thought she'd like it because she looks like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is no way to get in her good graces. Again, learn from my mistakes.

Just follow these simple rules, and the Marshmallow Popper will be your favorite toy ever! For those of you with poor social skills, it will even be your best friend. As you're writing your list to Santa this year, remember the Marshmallow Popper. And if he doesn't give you one, beg your parents until their ears bleed. They'll give in eventually. Stock up on marshmallows, and have a great Christmas, kids!