Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan of Stealing

Section 4: Read Anger Management story: Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan of Stealing

A. Teacher reads story to the class called "Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan of Stealing."

B. Story Description: This story is about a boy not only making a false accusation of a good friend, he punches him in the nose. Will his friend agree to forgive him? Find out in the story called "Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan Of Stealing." Please note that discussion questions are built into the story.

Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan of Stealing

Chapter 1: Matt Falsely Accuses Jonathan of Stealing

Matt was quite a popular guy. Unfortunately, the other day, he made a major mistake. He falsely accused his good friend, Jonathan, of stealing.

Matt had gone to his locker right before lunch. He looked around for his money that he normally stashed away in there. The only problem: it wasn't there. Matt muttered to himself, "Hey! What happened to my lunch money?"

Then Matt looked around. He happened to notice Jonathan smiling and brandishing some money. Matt just assumed that the money was his. So he blurted out, "Give it back!"

Jonathan was very puzzled. Confused, he asked, "Give what back?"

Matt said, "My money!"

Jonathan asked, "What are you talking about? This isn't yours. It's mine!"

Matt was sure that he was right. He began yelling, "THAT'S MY MONEY SO YOU BETTER GIVE IT BACK!"

Jonathan was a normally pretty good-natured and easy-going guy. But Matt's bizarre behavior made him suddenly see red. No way was he going to give away his own money just because Matt was having strange delusions or something. So Jonathan got very forceful with his words. He yelled, "YOU'RE CRAZY, MAN! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? ARE YOU PSYCHO OR SOMETHING? NOW GET OUT OF MY FACE, OR I'LL HAVE TO BREAK YOURS IN!"

This verbal threat of Jonathan's activated Matt's instincts for FIGHT OR FLIGHT. Matt didn't even take much time to think. He wasn't about to back down and choose the "FLIGHT" option. Instead he reflexively decided to choose the "FIGHT" option. So before Jonathan had a chance to follow through on his threat, Matt hauled off and punched him in the nose. Blood spurted out.

Next thing they both knew, the assistant principal, Mrs. Watchtower, came along and ordered, "All right, guys! Come with me to the office - NOW!!!"

FREEZE FRAME:

1. Teacher Says Or Asks: What Anger Triggers and Anger Cues did you observe happened to Matt so far?

Students Respond:

Anger Triggers:
1. Thinking his lunch money was stolen by Jonathan
2. Jonathan's yelling & threats

Anger Cues:
1. Yelling
2. False Accusations
3. Punching Jonathan in nose

2. Teacher Says Or Asks: What Anger Triggers and Anger Cues did you observe happened to Jonathan so far?

Students Respond:

Anger Triggers:
1. Being accused of stealing & having Matt demanding that he give up his own money

Anger Cues:
1. Yelling
2. Making idle threats that sound real
3. Bleeding & painful nose

3. Teacher Says Or Asks: What Anger Style did both Matt and Jonathan display: Acting Out, Displaced Anger, Ignored Anger, or Avoidance?

Students Respond:

Matt
1. Acting Out by yelling and punching
2. Displaced Anger when he wrongly accused Jonathan of stealing

Jonathan:
1. Acting Out by yelling and threatening

4. Teacher Says Or Asks: Which Response To Conflict did Matt and Jonathan each display: Passive, Aggressive, or Assertive?

Students Respond:

Matt
1. Aggressive by yelling and punching

Jonathan:
1. Aggressive by yelling and threatening

When they got to the office, Mrs. Watchtower sat both boys down. She handed Jonathan several tissues to clean up his nose. She also handed both boys a pad of paper and a pen and said, "Guys, I witnessed Matt punching Jonathan in the nose; however, I did not see or hear what went before. I would like you both to write down, detail by detail, what led up to this fight."

Jonathan finished writing first. Afterward, he stared unbelievingly at his supposed friend. He actually hadn't been planning to hit Matt when he made that threat. He was just trying to get Matt to lay off or come to his senses or something. In addition to focusing on the pain he was feeling in his nose, Jonathan thought, "Man! I never thought Matt would act like that! What's gotten into him anyway?!"

After Matt finished writing up his side of the story, Mrs. Watchtower read both accounts. Then she said, "Hmmmmm! It says here that Matt feels that Jonathan had stolen his lunch money. Jonathan claims the money he was holding belongs to him."

Matt snapped, "No way! That money was mine! I always keep my lunch money in a special place in my locker, and it wasn't there this time."

Mrs. Watchtower asked, "So what gave you the idea that Jonathan had taken it?"

Matt responded, "He was waving the money around and smiling."

The Assistant Principal asked, "What about it, Jonathan?"

Jonathan explained, "Mrs. Watchtower! Here's what happened. I was starving and ready to eat lunch. I assumed Matt would grab his money out of his locker like he usually did. I pulled my money out of my pocket to show him mine. Then I figured the two of us would try to be one of the first down to the cafeteria. Next thing I knew, Matt is talking like a psycho or something, telling me that my money is his. I told him it wasn't. He started yelling at me to give him my money. So I threatened him. I wasn't planning to actually break his face in, but that's what I yelled. I was just hoping he would come to his senses or something. But instead, he punched me in the nose."

Mrs. Watchtower said, "That sounds rather believable. What about it, Matt? Did you thoroughly search your locker"

Matt confirmed, "Yeah! I looked all around. It wasn't there."

Mrs. Watchtower then asked, "I'm curious! How does the money get in your locker in the first place?"

Matt was puzzled. He couldn't understand her line of questioning. He said, "I bring it from home."

Mrs. Watchtower continued her line of questioning. "And where do you keep it until you can get it to school?"

Matt said, "In my right-hand pocket."

Mrs. Watchtower said, "All right, Matt. Do you mind emptying both your pockets right now?"

Matt asked, "Why?"

Mrs. Watchtower said, "Just humor me, please. Empty your pockets."

Matt slowly reached his hand into his right-hand pocket and pulled out the lining. Empty! Then he reached his hand into his left-hand pocket, expecting to find it empty. Suddenly, he got a shocked and embarrassed look on his face. Slowly, he pulled out the two one dollar bills he had thought Jonathan had taken from him. Matt muttered, "How did that get in there?"

The Assistant Principal suggested, "Matt, apparently, you forgot to unload your pocket this morning. So here is the verdict. Jonathan, normally I would say making a threat such as you made this morning could have provoked the fight, and it probably did to some extent. However, you did not hit back. Since you did not, I am not going to give you three days out-of-school suspension. In fact, I will not suspend you at all. You will only have to serve one hour of after school detention.

Jonathan was not very happy about this, but he much preferred this punishment over getting suspended for three days and getting zeroes on all the assignments that he would miss out on during those three days.

Mrs. Watchtower continued, "As for Matt, you will be getting three days out-of-school suspension."

Matt complained, "That's not fair!"

Mrs. Watchtower asked, "I'm curious! Why do you feel that punishment is unfair?"

Matt said, "Well, I don't want to be suspended."

The Assistant Principal said, "I'm sorry, but those are the rules. When a student chooses to hit or fight at our school, he or she gets suspended for three days and gets zeroes on all the assignments and tests that he or she misses. The three days will begin tomorrow. One of your parents will need to come to school with you upon your return. The three of us will conference together, making certain you understand how to handle things better in the future."

Matt complained, "Mrs. Watchtower, I'm going to miss an important test in Science class. Getting a zero on that could really hurt my grade."

Mrs. Watchtower nodded and said, "Yes, I'm afraid it will. We will look forward to seeing you upon your return. In the meantime, I will escort you to the IAP room, which is our In School Alternate Program room, for the remainder of the day. Matt, you will be brought some lunch. You can pay me now, and you will be given lunch and some change back. Jonathan, I will give you a late pass to class and a pass to show the lunch monitor. You will be allowed to eat lunch with the sixth graders since seventh grade has about completed their lunch period."

Jonathan said, "Thank you, Mrs. Watchtower." Then Jonathan left the office, giving his now ex-friend a hard glare that Matt definitely noticed.

Matt felt miserable. He couldn't believe he had messed up like that. Matt thought, "What's wrong with me anyway? Maybe I am psycho or something. I've made a fool out of myself in front of Jonathan and probably destroyed our friendship. I earned myself three days out-of-school suspension. My parents will be furious! My teachers are going to give me a bunch of zeroes. Plus, I wonder what Jonathan will tell the other kids? Man! I really messed up big time!"

Matt didn't have a clue how he was going to fix things. What was he going to do?

FREEZE FRAME:

Teacher Says Or Asks: Are there any suggestions from the class?

Students Respond: (Accept Reasonable Answers)

Chapter 2: Matt Returns to School after being Suspended for Three Days

When Matt finished serving his three days out-of-school suspension, he returned to school with his Mom. She was not pleased with her son's behavior. Nor was she pleased to have to take time off work to bring him in today to conference with Mrs. Watchtower.

She had not made things very pleasant for him at home. Matt's Mom told him, "Matt! Just because you are home for three days does not mean you are on vacation. During school hours, you are going to do extra chores and also complete a certain number of assignments."

Matt complained, "But Mom! I'm going to get zeroes on them anyway."

Matt's Mom said, "Just the same, you need to learn the material so that you will not get too far behind. Besides, maybe some of your teachers might take pity on you and let you at least earn a little extra credit to try to bring those zeroes up."

Matt whined, "But, Moooooooooommmmmmmm!"

Matt's Mom snapped, "Don't 'but, Mom!' me! You are grounded to the house for those three days. No playing outside, no TV, and no video games. Like I said, you will do extra chores, work on assignments, and then you can read if you get bored."

Matt hadn't been pleased at all with the way his life was going now. Not able to think up any good arguments, he simply muttered, "Whatever!"

At the office conference, Mrs. Watchtower explained the school policy about fighting and hitting to Matt's Mom. Matt's Mom explained how Matt had made use of his three days out-of-school suspension. Then the Assistant Principal suggested, "Matt! I'm going to suggest you meet with Mrs. Feelgood, our guidance counselor, for at least one session. It sounds as if you might need some suggestions on how you might be able to straighten things out with Jonathan and perhaps your teachers."

Matt did not want to let the Assistant Principal know it, but he was secretly pleased with her suggestion. He was hoping he was going to be able to fix his friendship with Jonathan. Additionally, Matt thought back to when he and his mother walked into the school earlier that morning. He had noticed some of the kids were laughing. Suddenly feeling paranoid, he wondered if they were laughing at him. He certainly didn't want to be laughed at. So maybe Mrs. Feelgood would be able to help. He hoped so. But all Matt said to Mrs. Watchtower was, "Okay, ..., whatever."

In a few minutes, Matt's mother had left to drive off to work. Her parting words were, "Matt, be good! And good luck!" His Mom knew Matt was anxious to figure out how he could get Jonathan to forgive him. Plus, she realized that Matt was going to have to deal with all his teachers about all those zeroes he earned while he was suspended out-of-school.

In a few minutes, Matt was sitting in Mrs. Feelgood's guidance office. She said, "Matt do you care to tell me what happened?"

Matt filled Mrs. Feelgood in on all the details. The guidance counselor asked, "Matt, what do you think you could do differently next time you think some of your possessions are missing such as your lunch money?"

Matt responded, "Well, next time, I'll search around for a while first before deciding that somebody must have taken my stuff."

Mrs. Feelgood said, "Good idea! What else?"

Matt thought for awhile and then said, "Uh, well, uh, ... I don't know."

The guidance counselor said, "I'll get a little more specific. Instead of accusing Jonathan of stealing, what could you have done or said instead?"

Matt thought for a bit. Finally he said, "Well, I guess I could have asked him where he got the money he is holding. Also, I guess I could have told him I'm missing my lunch money and get him to help me search for it. Maybe then I would have thought to look in all my pockets and would have realized I had it all along. That was pretty stupid of me before!"

Mrs. Feelgood did not like students to beat up on themselves. She said, "You are not stupid as you are a smart young man. I prefer to say that it was simply a bit foolish. Hopefully, you've learned a good lesson and will know better how to handle things in the future."

Matt said, "Yeah! Uh, ..., Mrs. Feelgood, how can I fix things with Jonathan?"

She asked, "Have you tried apologizing?"

Matt admitted, "Not yet!"

Mrs. Feelgood suggested, "That could be a start."

"What else?" Matt probed.

Mrs. Feelgood asked, "Did you ever take Mr. Campbell's Communication Skills class?"

Matt nodded and said, "Yeah! I had it last quarter. Why?"

Mrs. Feelgood asked, "What did he say about reaching a WIN-WIN outcome with others?"

Matt tried to remember what Mr. Campbell had said. Finally, Matt responded, "Well, he said that it was okay to want to WIN, but we should try to find a way that the other person could WIN too. So I guess I could apologize to Jonathan. Then I could say that a WIN for me would be for him to forgive me. I could ask him what I would need to do so that it would be a WIN for him. Do you think that might work?"

Mrs. Feelgood smiled and said, "I'm very impressed. You came up with an excellent suggestion. Why don't you try it out and let me know how it works?"

Matt said, "Okay, I will. Uh, ..., thanks."

Chapter 3: Matt Tries To Fix His Friendship with Jonathan

About mid-morning, Matt caught up with Jonathan between classes. Matt said, "Uh, Jonathan?"

Jonathan gruffly answered, "Yeah?"

Matt said, "I would like to apologize for hitting you and accusing you and stuff. I really messed up!"

Jonathan nodded and confirmed, "Yeah! You did. Well, see you around."

Matt still wanted to try to fix their friendship. He quickly said, "Wait a minute, Jonathan. Uh, you know, I would really like to find a way that we can fix our friendship. That would be a WIN for me, like Mr. Campbell was always talking about. But what would be a WIN for you?"

Jonathan thought for a few moments. Finally, he said, "Well, for starters, you can never accuse me of stealing again. Also, you better not be hitting me again, especially in the nose. That really hurt, man!"

Matt said again, "I'm really sorry! I think I must have been psycho or something that day. Do you think you could simply chalk it up to temporary insanity on my part and forgive a crazy guy?"

Jonathan was softening, but he didn't want to make it too easy on Matt. He hedged, "I'll think about it."

Matt nodded his head resignedly. He realized that he was just going to have to be patient and wait until Jonathan felt ready to come around. Hopefully, Jonathan would be willing to forgive him eventually. Matt again said, "Okay. Once again, I'm really sorry. I know I messed up big time."

Jonathan nodded and walked on to his next class.

By lunch time, Jonathan had decided he would take pity on the poor guy. So he walked up to Matt as he was getting his lunch money out of his locker. Jonathan somewhat jokingly asked, "Do you have your lunch money?"

Matt nodded and said, "Yeah! Why?"

Halfway joking, halfway serious, Jonathan said, "Well, if you didn't, I was going to run for cover."

Matt looked at Jonathan quickly and noticed the big grin on his face. Matt asked, "So, am I forgiven?"

Jonathan nodded and said, "Yeah! Just don't ever let it happen again!"

Matt said with a relieved smile, "It won't! I promise!"

Matt realized he had learned a very important lesson. He thought, "I hope I never mess up like that again. But if I do, I guess making a sincere apology and trying to find a way for me and the other person to WIN can really help. It wasn't fun, but thankfully it worked."

Matt and Jonathan headed off to lunch. Their friendship wasn't quite like it was, but in time, it will hopefully be as good as new. For after all, Matt now had a greater appreciation for how he should treat his friends if he wants to keep his friendships intact.

FREEZE FRAME:

Teacher Says Or Asks: What about you? If you were Jonathan, how quick would you be to forgive Matt?

Students Respond: (Accept Reasonable Answers)

FREEZE FRAME:

Teacher Says Or Asks: When you have accidentally or purposely disrespected someone, hurt their feelings, hurt them physically, or made them mad in some other way, what are some other things you can do to fix things?

Students Respond:
1. Sincere Apologies
2. Talk things out
3. Work for a WIN for both of you
4. Help them cool down or give them time to cool down
5. Take responsibility for your actions by giving calm explanations and sincere apologies
6. Ask them for suggestions on how you could fix things that would be a WIN for them as well as you
7. Brainstorm solutions
8. Act on those ideas and be more respectful from now on

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