May-December Romances

The image of a wrinkled, hump-backed old man hanging on to the arm of a fresh-faced young woman may be discomforting, and it is true and May-December romances are often used as fodder for a comedian's act, especially if the old man and young woman are celebrities. The fact is, though, that many May-December (this is just a term used to describe a relationship between a people who are anywhere from 10 years old or older than the other person) can be successful.

The one question that is often asked of a May-December romance is what the two people have in common with each other. For many, it may be family ties-the older person was married to the younger person's sibling or other family member and the younger person was married to someone else.

Both marriages ended, either through death or divorce, but continued contact at family and other gatherings led to a blossoming of a romance. For these people, family is the commonality.

Others involved in May-December romances may have grown up in the same socioeconomic circumstances and understand what each one went through. In their cases, age doesn't play a role; the fact that both of them survived their situations and are still vibrant, active people is sufficient common ground for a romance to develop.

For some, it may be a matter of convenience. The older person has no one to take care of him or her, and the younger person is willing to marry or enter into a monogamous relationship so that the older person will not be alone. Sometimes the promise of an inheritance is involved; other times, it is simply a matter of someone caring that deeply for another person.

A May-December romance isn't for everyone, but those who wish to enter into such a relationship should be allowed to do so without judgment or censure. Unless it is obvious that there is an ulterior motive on the part of one of the participants, family members and others should stay out of the situation.

If it is evident that an ulterior motive exists, however, family members or responsible parties can take steps to protect the assets of the person who may be affected. There should be clear evidence, though, that this is occurring before any steps are taken.