"mean What You Say and Say What You Mean"

When a person does not attach any meaning or significance to his or her words, that is generally the type of person who does not give meaning, hold meaning, or find meaning, in much of anything.

This, as with many other subjects, can go either of two ways. When individuals possess a degree of maturity, and of balance within themselves, a mere "agree to disagree" works-- and is equally acceptable to all parties concerned. However, sometimes it does not come to that "agree to disagree" point; and, depending on the individuals and the situation, the results can range anywhere from mild misunderstanding to hurt or angry feelings to all-out manipulation and attacks.

I recall a number of years ago when an acquaintance stated "Words are just words-- they don't mean anything." The fact, which most people are fully aware, is that language is the number-one form of communication, the number-one means of interacting with other people. That leaves quite a bit of leeway-- not for what words "mean," but for what they can "do."

In this locale, there are two aspects of this subject which never fail to set me on-edge, and also have often placed me on the receiving end of extreme negativity. As I have mentioned in an earlier article, the intentional misuse of words and terms as a factor in attempting to confuse and manipulate people has been one of my most longstanding "dislikes" about this particular locale.

However, my preference for "say what you mean and mean what you say" takes on yet another angle. The attack comes in the form of "there is something wrong with anyone who does not do things the way it is acceptable here." No; I prefer to say what I mean and mean what I say-- and generally do, unless I am backed up against a wall, essentially forced to say things that I do not mean.

One example, which covers people in all age groups, is that many have the habit of taking leave of a person they are speaking with, by saying "I love you!" Young kids and older folks alike use this phrase at the end of their conversations in person and on the phone, as if it is nothing but a replacement for the more standard "See you later" or "Have a good day." What is worse than being on the receiving end of such a phrase while knowing the speaker does not attach any real meaning to it, is being on the receiving end of anger and nastiness for not freely using it.

Those of us who prefer to not use such phrases unless we are expressing its true significance then become open to attacks on everything from our backgrounds to our personalities-- as if "say what you mean and mean what you say" is some type of character flaw.

However, those who express the opinion that there is something very negative about not tossing around words or phrases of affection when the feelings are not present are missing the point-- when one says what one does not mean, one is diminishing the significance of it to the point that it does not mean anything. The currently popular habit of saying 'I love you' to every friend, acquaintance, and person one comes in contact with, does precisely that; as does the habit of addressing "everybody" by "affectionate" terms. The end result is none of those words and terms mean anything at all.

As I've seen during the last few years, many important aspects of life have lost their meaning. These trends in vocabulary only emphasize that fact.