Media Myths About the Quiverfull Movement

I recently had the opportunity to watch several TLC programs on large families and a few other news blips about "the Quiverfull movement". Much of it was enjoyable and entertaining, but I couldn't help but notice the shock in the voices of interviewers, or the utter disdain on the faces of some audience members in one talk-show featuring the Duggar family. I also noticed quite a few myths and misunderstandings about this so-called movement. I do believe the media tried to give the featured families a fair shake, and allowed them to express themselves clearly, but the programs still couldn't avoid commonly held misconceptions about those who choose to reject the idea of "family planning".

Myth #1-"It's a relatively new movement"

I laugh every time I hear this one. Planned Parenthood is the new kid on the block, so to speak. The rejection of contraception was a position held by the Christian Church since it's inception. The Early Church Fathers condemned contraception in strong (even harsh) terms, as did Martin Luther, John Calvin, the Wesley brothers, and many more. For nearly two-thousand years the Church worldwide considered contraception to be on the same level of evil as abortion and infanticide. Whoever coined the term "quiverfull" did not dream up a brand-new movement. They simply found a useful catch-word or label for a belief that is thousands of years old. "Quiverfull" only looks like a movement now because it's adherents have been in the minority since the Western Church accepted contraception and the two-child norm.

Myth #2-"Quiverfull families strive to have as many children as physically possible"

While there may be a few misguided folks who think the goal is to "make" as many babies as they can, the vast majority of Quiverfull believers look at it far differently. A popular misconception is that if one uses no birth control, one will end up like Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar (16 kids), or worse. The fact is, human beings are relatively infertile, and folks like the Duggars are an exception, not the rule. Many factors affect fertility-age, nutrition, weight, general health, and so on-but to Quiverfull families, the main "factor" is God's will. The purpose of rejecting contraception is not to pump out babies every year, but to joyfully accept as many children as the Lord will give. On the flip side, this means that Quiverfull families also sometimes must joyfully accept as few children as the Lord gives, not using fertility drugs or IVF to overcome medically unexplained infertility. The Quiverfull families that I know range from having no children, to having 16, averaging around 6. Many of the larger families include several adopted children as well as biological children.

Myth #3-"It's a race thing-limited to white, conservative evangelicals"

I may be white American, but I checked this morning and my husband is still very much the black Ethiopian man that I married. Both of us are "Quiverfull", and we know a large and growing number of non-white people either joining the Quiverfull movement, or finding out there's a name for the life they've already been living. Among the ethnicities that we know of personally are Korean, Indian, Cuban, African-American, and Africans from many nations. I do not know why the media has chosen to focus only on white evangelicals, but it's a misleading focus. My Ethiopian in-laws are "Quiverfull", though they don't know it. My father-in-law refers to it as "Children-are-blessings-from-the-Lord.-Why-do-you-Western-missionaries-insist-on-distributing-condoms?".

Myth #4-"They all look the same-long haired women, lots of denim, etc"

This is another misguided media focus. Quiverfull families come in all shapes and sizes. Even though the families presented on TLC's "Kid's by the dozen" programs were white evangelical Christians, anyone paying even the slightest attention would have noticed the differences in style, lifestyle, and family dynamics. Some families go for the long-hair and denim jumpers look (like the Duggars) but others look pretty darn normal. My husband hates denim jumpers, well, most jumpers of any kind, so I wear more normal clothing though I strive to make it modest.

Myth #5-"Having many babies destroys a woman's body"

This myth is a result of our culture's view of pregnancy as a near-deadly disease. Pregnancy and birth certainly change a woman's body, and make it difficult for her to look like a Hollywood starlet, but rarely does having babies do serious damage. What does happen frequently is that poor nutrition, inactivity, or less frequently disabling accidents make the process more difficult and cause secondary damage. Healthy women who take care of their bodies are unlikely to suffer much from "damage" directly due to pregnancy and birth. The women that I know who've had 6 or 10 or 14 children are vibrant, active, and very healthy, even the one who's had all of hers, including multiple sets of twins, by cesarean-section. Just take a look at those large-family moms on TLC. They certainly don't look run down. Actually, they look a whole lot better than me, and I'm only 24, about to deliver my third child.

Myth #6-"Quiverfull women and children get the short end of the stick"

Our culture of "tolerance" can't seem to tolerate very well old-fashioned family structure or values, it seems. Many of the complaints I've heard about the Quiverfull movement have to do with how "quiet" and un-ambitious the women and girls are, and how much work the children end up doing, including helping to care for siblings. Once again, it is not the Quiverfull lifestyle that is new, but the idea that women should be aggressive, and that children should not have to work. Some Quiverfull families do subscribe to what seems like an extreme form of patriarchy from the perspective of mainstream people, but that family dynamic is not limited to people who reject birth control, nor do all of us subscribe to it. But because even moderately traditional or patriarchal families look odd to the mainstream, we all get lumped together. What many people cannot seem to understand is that these "quiet" women have made the choice to be unassuming rather than dominating, and have found other ways to express themselves and fulfill their needs to create and be productive.

When it comes to children and work, I think the average American could learn a lot from these families. Learning to clean, cook, change diapers, and watch over younger siblings are all life-skills that will carry those children through the rest of their lives, when they are single (and don't have to survive on Ramen and fast food) and when they eventually marry and have their own children. Too many of my peers are terrified of parenthood because they've never held a baby, let alone changed a diaper or bathed an infant. Children who learn the basics of housekeeping and childcare early on will have an advantage over their peers as they reach adulthood. Confidence and competence in these things translates into less stress and more ability to simply enjoy life.

There are absolutely families within the Quiverfull movement who have serious problems. However, those problems are not due to rejection of birth control, but to human faults and failures, much like the problems we see in "normal" families. Having many children does not automatically mean relational chaos or abuse, any more than having only two children does. Clearly, family planning hasn't fulfilled it's promise of bliss for women and children, as we still have full shelters and the need for programs to help abused women and children.

As someone on the inside of the "Quiverfull movement", I think it's important that people not misunderstand or misinterpret what I believe. Disagreement doesn't bother me, but disagreement based on false information can be frustrating! It is important that myths be dispelled in order for genuine dialog to occur about this issue (or any issue, for that matter!).