Memories of Mrs. Tommie

I began attending Oak Grove Baptist Church with Shawn on various occasions almost from the time we met. Oak Grove is a church located in Attica, Arkansas where both he and I have family that has connections to the area. His parents continue to live in Attica, Arkansas.

Prior to Shawn's being in control of the sound equipment, we sat on the opposite side of the church but always on the back pew. "Back Seat Baptists" my grandma always called them. I have never been sure what she meant by that comment.

Within the first visits to the church with Shawn, I learned one deacon had the last name Weatherford. Weatherford isn't a common name and it is a name deeply connected with Attica. After speaking with this person, we learned who our common ancestors were. His father and my great-grandmother were first cousins.

For years, I did not connect the very sweet elderly couple who sat on the row in front of Shawn and I as also being from the family. This connection should have struck before it did as the kind lady always referred to my great-great grandfather as "Uncle Frank." I let this go because my dad also referred to him as "Uncle Frank" and Frank was my dad's great-grandfather.

It was two years ago or so that I connected this kind lady as being sister to the deacon and therefore family.

For years, she and her husband sat on the pew in front of us at church. He was down more than she was but she was barely mobile herself. I learned about him being a former chiropractor and of other connections between Mrs. Tommie and my family. When my children were born, she and her husband gave us wonderful gifts for our babies.

Mrs. Tommie was the one lady at our church who truly showed an interest in me. I am brutally shy and avoid people sometimes for that reason. In spite of my being so shy, she never failed to say "hi" and ask how I was doing. She knew I had health problems and I could tell she cared about me.

Several months ago, Mrs. Tommie went into a nursing home. Her husband died last year and I don't think she wanted to be alone. They were married many, many years. Mrs. Tommie and her husband had a blended marriage with her being Baptist and he Catholic. They attended services together at both churches-Saturday nights Catholic and Sunday mornings Baptist. I could tell they loved each other deeply and often would look at them hoping Shawn and I would have that same love even when we needed canes and walkers as they did.

This morning our pastor spoke of a funeral. After a few more sentences he said, "We didn't know Mrs. Tommie was going to die." It was a rude awakening for me. Although my class made care bags in my plan to go to the nursing home and visit her, the bags went to our local hospital instead. Now I realize I will never see her again and will never hear her talk about "Uncle Frank."

She was buried yesterday and I was unable to attend. I told her brother how sorry I was she is gone following services and I simply did not know she was gone. What I missed was the burial of her body though, I know we will be reunited again.

I realize she is in Heaven with her husband. Neither of them needs walkers or canes. I will miss her genuine smile and concern deeply. I had to write this completely bloggy type, emotional article as a release. My heart is broken. If you look for me today and I am not here this is why but I will be back tomorrow as it is another day.