Men: What to Do Before Marriage

You may be preparing for marriage or you may be only thinking about it. Either way, the lovely institute of marriage can begin on the wrong foot unless you have planned appropriately. By following these principles, you can save yourself and your future bride a great deal of hassle.

Financial Independence. Most people are in debt. If you are not, then you are one the few exceptions. Financial independence does not simply mean being able to pay the bills this month and having a little extra left over for recreation. Financial independence means being out of debt, having a well-stocked savings account and reasonable job security. Even if you have given yourself plenty of leeway while on your own, being married can cut a rather large hole in your financial pocket. You are not naïve. You know that it will not simply be extra expenses incurred by your wife. Women have many ideas and methods of spending money and you must be aware of her financial position to begin with. This does not just mean that you should be aware of her financial goals, but that you should have ample proof that she has been exercising good financial habits for the past year or so.

Property Care. Even if you have a loving, stay-at-home woman, make it easier on both of you by tidying up the place. This includes all yard work, junk vehicles and garbage lying around the yard, cleaning up the garage, making the house reasonably clean and implementing some sort of organizational system. Be ready to inform your new wife of where everything goes and where future purchases will be stored. If she is a bit forgetful or you are not sure that even you will remember, make a chart or list.

Body Care. You can always tell how someone thinks of themselves by the manner in which they treat themselves. It does not matter if you are both fat and dumpy, if you do not take some initiative in getting your body into shape, she may not either. Show her and yourself that you value your body and your life and that you would like to be a well-rounded individual. Chances are, she will follow in your footsteps and take care of herself, too.

Job Security. We all have a little job security, whether it be from working harder and longer hours or from implementing more than one income to make sure the rent is paid. You are in control of how much job security you have and you should be taking steps to gain greater security now that you will have extra people to provide for. This will eliminate doubt, frustration and fear in your relationship. Marriages are hard enough work without bringing in fear.

Evaluation of Your Wife-to-be. Even though these steps are meant to make sure that you are ready for this marriage, it is equally important to make sure that she is ready for it, too. If she has improper or out-of-control spending habits, does not keep a clean home, is out of shape and lives hand-to-mouth on a regular basis, then you can be in for a wild ride. All of your hard, dedicated work will have been for nothing. Do not make the mistake of believing that she will start forming the habits which you already have. This is not a guarantee and you need to be able to leave her alone with her own self discipline. If you cannot, then perhaps she is not ready for the commitment.

Make sure your emotional maturity is well-developed and remember: if you cannot live with yourself and be happy, you most certainly cannot live with someone else and expect to fill the void.