Midlife Crisis: Mood Swings and Dressing Like a Teen are Signs

One day, you're a teenager, hanging out with your friends and daydreaming about finally getting out of your parents' house. Then time flies by, and you wake up one morning to find that you're almost 30, and your life is nowhere near what you thought it would be. You have no spare money, no spare time and all your friends are busy with their own lives. What happened? Enter the midlife crisis.

According to malehealth.co.uk, most men experience this trying time between their late 30's to early 50's. According to an article online at CareerJournal.com by Sue Shellenbarger, a reporter for TheWall Street Journal, this occurs for women in their late 40's and early 50's. For me, 2 1/2 weeks away from 29th birthday, the time is now.

How do you know that you are having a midlife crisis? Based on recent personal experience, here are some signs that you are in the midst of one.

Dressing like you did as a teenager.
I have been in the throes of this for about two months now. I recently felt the need to spend some extra money on clothing. I got a bit carried away in quantity and in style. I have taken to wearing babydoll tops that plunge quite a bit, skirts that are a bit shorter than I would normally choose, and jeans that look like they have been painted on my body. I have also adopted a love of shoes, the higher the heel the happier I am. What has gotten into me?

Spending money extravagantly.
Obviously I did this during the above mentioned shopping spree, but this is not limited to clothing. Anything goes here. Cd's, movies, jewelry, dinners at expensive restaurants, computer games....I could go on. I am usually fairly frugal, but lately I feel the need to spend any money that does not go towards bills on frivolous things that I really don't need.

Being jealous of teenagers.
This sounds so stupid, but it's so true. I watch teenagers out and about with their friends, having an awesome time, and I wonder "Why can't I be like that?" I am beginning to resent the fact that I have to work and pay bills. I want to go to the movies, go to wild parties, lay out by the pool, and whatever else I used to do as a teenager.

Doing things you wouldn't normally do.
This could be anything. Piercing yourself, getting a tattoo (or several), drinking excessively, or putting yourself on several on-line dating sites. I am not saying that their is anything wrong with any of these activities, but, if these are things you wouldn't normally do, you need to stop and evaluate why you are doing them.

Doing anything to avoid being at home.
I have been doing this a lot lately. I don't want to go back to an empty apartment and stew over why my life is the way it is. I work 3 jobs to avoid being there. When I'm not working, I am at someone else's house. It's easier than facing what is going on with me right now.

Being extremely moody and/or crying a lot.
This could also be a sign of depression or another problem. For me, I'm crying for my lost youth and for all the things I wish I could do again.

Taking many trips down Memory Lane.
Do you think about your past a lot? Remembering all the fun and friends you had when you were younger? Bringing this up to friends repeatedly? I have been doing this a lot, especially with my friends from junior high school.

Doing anything to get attention.
This could be indicative of another problem as well. I am catching myself dressing sexier, trying on-line dating sites, flirting more, anything to get noticed. Why? Possibly so I don't feel so old and unwanted.

Now that I'm at the point where I believe this is a midlife crisis, I have had to sit and really think about how to get through this. I am not even sure where to begin. I have come up with a few ideas.

Stop and think!
I am forcing myself to stop and think before I do things (usually). Do I really need this blouse that I'm about to buy? If I do buy it, will I have enough money left to put gas in my truck? I am trying to consider the consequences of the thing I am about to do.

Talk to someone you trust.
I have talked to several friends about this. They are being very supportive of me. You need at least two good friends to help you through this, especially if you are about to do something crazy. They should be able to talk you through it.

Pray.
I know that not everyone has the same faith that I do, but I really believe in the power of prayer. I pray quite frequently and that does get me through the day.

Obviously this is not an exhaustive guide to recognizing and handling a midlife crisis. Most of this is based on personal experience. If you are feeling that you are going through this, do a bit of research on the subject and discuss it with someone you really trust. You can get through this, hopefully with just a pierced belly button and a slight bit of embarrassment.

Dan Fielder, Mid-Life Crisis, Malehealth.co.uk
Sue Shellenbarger, Midlife Crisis Becomes An Issue for More Women, CareerJournal.com (originally published in the Wall Street Journal)