Minding Our Words; Minding Our Thoughts

I remember being told when I was young, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." I didn't realize this little tidbit of wisdom had Biblical backup.

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Ephesians 4:29

A definition of unwholesome gives us much to stay away from. It is defined as injurious to physical, mental or moral health; unhealthy; offensive or loathsome. So if we are not to let anything unwholesome come out of our mouths, then we have to be aware of how our words will affect someone else. Will it affect their mental or moral health? Will they find it offensive?

Ephesians further goes on to say that we should only say helpful things for building others up according to their needs. We aren't supposed to be saying things that will help build up others as we want but as they need. Are we really thinking about what we are saying and the spirit with which we are saying it? Are we trying to build others up or put them in their place?

Everything we say is supposed to be for their benefit, not their detriment. Not to embarrass or call them on the carpet for a scolding. Too often we are quick to let others know just what they are doing wrong and we speak in a way that is not kind.

There is more than one way to talk to someone, even when we are telling them a harsh truth. We can choose to use harsh, bitter words or we can choose to use kind, gentle words. Which would be more wholesome? Which would be more to their benefit and mental health?

I suggest we even use these guidelines when we use self-talk. We hear from ourselves more than anyone and we constantly have a conversation going on in our heads. We have to be very aware of what we are saying to ourselves.

Part of speaking wholesome, beneficial words is thinking good thoughts. If we are thinking unwholesome thoughts, then unwholesome words are bound to come out of our mouths. We have to guard our minds to guard our mouths.

"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 23:7

Resources
Day 103 - Embracing A Restless Peace

Wikipedia - As a Man Thinketh

The Free Dictionary - Unwholesome Definition