Missing B

He had not been expecting a letter. The knock on his door had stirred him from his daydream no more than five minutes ago. And, a wonderful daydream it had been. The police chief himself had presented him with a medal for services to the city. Chief Higgs had even clapped him on the back as though they were best friends. But, back in reality Chief Higgs would rather slap cuffs on him for meddling in police business. But that was what made him a good reporter. Though Chief Higgs would never admit it he was the one that cracked the case of the missing tooth. Little Johnny had lost in an apple. The apple seemed so obvious to him, but not to the police, not even Chief Higgs.

But, now he was face to face with A.

"B is missing." A was still staring at him.

"Sorry, have a seat," he said trying to regain his composure. It was not everyday that a letter entered his office. In fact, he hadn't seen a letter off the written page in some time.

"So, you have a missing person's case?" he asked.

"No, B is missing. She is a letter."

"Oh, yes of course, B. Have you gone to the police?"

"They think P and little C are B. They won't listen. All they'll do is point to the written page and say B is right there. But, its not B. It's P and c filling in."

"P and c, huh? What about C?"

"C is right where he always is."

"OK, when did B go missing?"

"Yesterday."

"What was he doing?"

"Building a boat. He was going to go fishing with F."

"Is the boat around?"

"No, the boat is flat."

"Oh." He said puzzled.

"We're all flat on the written page, the boat is flat, not round."

"Oh, yes of course," he reminded himself he was speaking with a letter after all. "Is the boat still here or is it missing, too."

"F and f took it out fishing."

"Did B have any enemies?"

"Only two."

"Who are they?"

"Just two."

"So, B had two enemies?"

"No, just one, two."

"Oh, 2 is B's enemy."

"That's what I said."

"2 doesn't like being replaced by B in cryptograms. 2 has always wanted to be a letter."

"So, you suspect 2 then?"

"No, 2 is smart enough to go after Z."

"Because he makes a better Z than B?"

"Exactly."

"So, do you have a suspect in mind."

"True."

"Ok, so who do think took B."

"True."

"True is your suspect?" He was understanding A better now.

"Yes, he and False are always giving me, B, C and sometimes D trouble."

"Why is that?"

"They don't like multiple choice questions."

"Ah, I see"

"Where is True now?"

"Don't know but, he always comes when he's called."

"I really don't like mathematical proofs."

"Well, you'll have to do one to call him," A said as he left the room.

"Proofs," he grumbled as he started proving the square root of two to be irrational. As he wrote TRUE across the finished proof he heard a voice. "You called?"

"True, where is B?" he asked, cutting all typical pleasantries.

"Where he always is."

"No, that's P and c."

"B's really missing then?"

"Yes, and I think you know something."

"Sure, I know lots of things but, until I have proof I don't really know anything."

"Where is B?" he asked again, this time more in a more appeasing tone.

"I do not know," True said as he faded away.

Where was B? He had no leads and his sources had left him alone. He picked up the phone.

"Chief Higgs please," he said to the voice on the other end.

"Police Chief, this is Rogers," announced a voice.

"Ted, I need to talk to the Chief about B."

"Oh, it's you. The Chief is busy, his kid just got straight As on his report card and the Chief is posing for pictures with him."

"B is missing Ted. What are you guys doing about it."

"B is where is always is. Find a real job." And then the line went dead.

As usual the cops were going to be of little help. He was amazed that little chief junior had managed all As. That boy always had one B creep in to mess up his father's gloating.

"That's it!"

He grabbed his keys and headed off to the school. Sure enough the principle pulled out the boy's records and the most recent report card listed all As. He spoke with each of the boys teachers and eventually learned that his Health teacher had turned in a B as his final grade. The grade had been changed! B had been overwritten.