"Modern Family" Writing in Episode (1/12/2011): As Good as "Who's on First" Confusion Comedy

"Modern Family," Wed., Jan. 12, 2011, 8 PM (ET) '" As the episode opened, Alex (Ariel Winter), the Dunphy child prodigy, is studying for a test. She is determined not to be outdone by Sanjay Patel, the Indian child who is Number One in her class. All Alex's O/C tendencies are on display, most notably something Alex does with her jaw when she is concentrating, which Luke (Nolan Gould) says is "like the hippopotamus at the miniature golf place." ("Where does she get it from?" says Claire.)

Concerned parents Claire (Julie Bowen) and Phil (Tyrell Burrell) encourage Alex to stop and eat , a suggestion that she ignores, leading younger brother Luke (Nolan Gould) to throw a grape at her. (Luke: "She's gotta' eat. I did it out of love!")

MITCHELL & TYLER:

The focus of the hilarious episode written by Dan O'Shannon and Bill Wrubel shifts to gay couple Cameron (Eric Stonestreet) and Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson). Mitchell's old girlfriend from high school, Tracey (played by Mary Lynn Rasjskub, who was stalwart Chloe O'Brian for 126 episodes of "24" between 2003 and 2010) bumps into the pair at the mall. She seems unhappy to have run into the boy who took her to the Prom in high school. Cameron asks, "Did he (Mitchell) have a beard?" And Tracy responds, "You're looking at her. Of course, I didn't know it back then." Mitchell confesses to Cameron that he and Tracey "got it on" in the nurse's office ("I can still hear the rustling of the paper on the nurse's examining table"). When he sees Tracey, at the mall, just from the back, leaving with a short redheaded boy, his mind makes a giant leap forward. Cameron says it might be a false alarm. ("This could be my going bald scare all over again," agrees Mitchell). Mitchell tells Cameron that he has to find out whether this little boy is his son by Tracey.

Cameron reacts brilliantly, sliding to the floor in an emotional reaction to the news, but, after a night spent pondering the prospect that Mitchell might have a biological child, Cameron says, "If there's another kid, how can that be anything but good?" The two determine they will go to Tracy's house and investigate further. This leads nowhere good. The pair take a present for what they think is an 8-year-old boy (a hat labeled "Little Slugger") only to learn that the short redheaded male was a "little person," to whom Tracey is married. Cameron's attempts to bail early on the sinking ship ("Well, I'll just run along and leave you two to get re-acquainted") are hilarious.

JAY & GLORIA:

Back at Jay and Gloria's house, a couple of whom Jay says, "They're boring as hell" has more-or-less invited themselves for the night. At dinner, Jay confesses that he doesn't really like the couple. He says this aloud at dinner, thinking that they will never have to see the couple again (and saying so), but Gloria has invited them to spend the night. ("This is awkward.") Jay later has the line, "I'll be happy when I hear a trunk close."

Gloria attempts to "cover" for Jay's rudeness by implying to the visiting couple that Jay is suffering from dementia. Manny (Rico Rodriguez) doesn't help any when the couple engages him in breakfast conversation about his stepfather's "condition' and Manny makes several hilarious comments that could be taken one of two ways. Manny is talking about Jay's golf game, but it plays into the dementia diagnosis. ( Manny: "I'm surprised he hasn't killed someone yet. It's really bad when he goes into the woods.") The writing was simply brilliant.

Other great lines from this episode:

Mitchell to Cameron: "You're so gay that you can't even think of real girls' names." (Cameron has been giving Mitchell a list of his old girlfriends that consists of actress names from Hollywood musicals.)

Jay to Gloria, "As you get older, you shouldn't have to put up with some bozos who glommed on to you."

Gloria to Jay, (after he acts rudely towards the boring couple at dinner): "Husband and wives are supposed to look out for one another, not throw each other under the bus."

Jay to Claire, (right after a discussion of whether they are not intellectual enough to be as smart as Sanjay Patel's parents) "Sweet! "Croctopus" tickets confirmed!"

Phil to Claire at the movies, where they accidentally run into the Patels, who are on their way to an intellectual film (while the Dunphys are on their way to "Croctopus"), "Why do I have to watch a French movie? I didn't do anything wrong."

I viewed what seemed like every French film ever made at the Chicago Film Festival, until I finally had to break down and buy a ticket to a regular movie ("Catfish"), so I could relate to this plot line. I'm not sure whether it was the "Mozart's Sister" one or the one with the talking catfish that got me, but never sit through more than one French film a week is my new motto.