Monitoring the Movies Your Kids Watch

I'll be honest and say that I am not a parent and do not see myself as being one for another five years or so. But I am a movie guy as well as a churchgoer, and I like to think I have some idea of what's appropriate for kids and what is not. I don't claim to be the one who's got it all figured out, as I have friends in college who refuse to watch R-rated movies, and I know other kids in their preteens who wouldn't bat an eye at "Pulp Fiction." What I would like to do now, though, is share some insights I have gained about the matter both in my own reflection and in conversations with others, hopefully in a way that helps you understand the importance of keeping your kids away from inappropriate material without "sheltering" them.

First, don't rely on the MPAA. Their standards are constantly being pushed. A "PG-13" movie today could easily have been rated "R" ten years ago. For a more comprehensive, detailed explanation for what exactly a movie contains as regards sexuality, violence etc., your best bet is to check out any number of websites, most of them Christian, that break down both the filmmaking quality and the appropriateness of the material. I would recommend Christian Answers or Christianity Today.

It is very important that you know what you believe is appropriate. If you're constantly watching movies with lots of adult content, it's very difficult to enforce boundaries on your kids, especially when they get older and may call you out on it.

You have to know your kids and what they can handle, pure and simple. You must remember that your job is not to protect them from every bad possible thing, but to know when too much is too much, and at what rate you must expose them to new things. As a practicing Christian, there are certain aspects of a movie, mainly nudity for its own sake, that I never find appropriate and which I will not allow my kids to experience.

So how can you know what your kids are watching, and how can you influence them? Well, first, if you want to know, just ask them. Even if they can't give you a straight answer, at least they know you care. Also, you may wish to have their friends over to get to know them as well. You can tell a lot about your kids simply by the kind of people they hang out with. And finally, be involved in your kids' lives as someone they can trust and confide in. They will take your opinion a lot more seriously if they trust you, and in the end, trust is what it's all about.