More Amusement Park Rides to Be Made into Movies
Autopia - Disneyland
The Ride: You know this ride. Kids drive cars around a track at a blistering three miles an hour. They can steer the cars themselves with a guide rail down the middle to keep them from steering into the parking lot.
The Movie: Genre (Action-Adventure) Vin Diesel stars as a suicidal NASCAR driver who keeps trying to wreck his car but can't no matter how hard he tries. Lindsay Lohan is the reporter who tries to get his story but instead discovers an awful truth -- NASCAR races are rigged.
It's a Small World - Disneyland
The Ride: An excruciatingly slow boat travels through animatronic dolls singing what is perhaps the most loathsome song in human history.
The Movie: Genre (Horror) Five teens from different countries descend into madness while trapped in a lifeboat with only one working I-pod. The I-pod has but a single song on it -- Achy Breaky Heart.
The Carousel of Progress - Disneyworld
The Ride: The theater rotates around a central stage that features a family undergoing technological changes in their home as their house becomes the Home of Tomorrow.
The Movie: Genre (dramedy) Tom Hanks and Rene Zellweger star as parents of a dysfunctional family whose house changes every time they leave it and return. In an explosively creative twist, the house goes through a time warp BACK in time instead of forward! Can Tom and Rene figure out what's going on before they wind up in a time before microwave popcorn?
The Jungle Cruise - Disneyworld
The Ride: Cruise up the exotic rivers to see ancient ruins, exotic plastic animals, and zany explorers while your tour guide tells jokes you found funny in the third grade.
The Movie: Genre (comedy) A comedy tour to the jungles of South America becomes a cavalcade of adventurous fun as our zany comedians meet headhunters, cannibals, primitive tribes, and The Lost River of Gold. Featuring an all-star cast of today's hottest comedians: Gilbert Gottfried, Andrew Dice Clay, Michael Winslow, Margaret Cho, Bobcat Goldthwait and Michael Richards in a stunning comeback role as the riverboat captain.
Any Log Flume - Any Amusement Park
The Ride: You sit on a log and get wet in these slow, soggy (but fun) rollercoaster knockoffs.
The Movie: Genre (drama) Environmentalists try to stop evil loggers from destroying a beautiful forest in this heart-warming tale of passion and natural beauty. Former vice-president Al Gore has a brief cameo as Zeke, a mountain hermit with a heart of gold. Watch for the thrilling climax as our heroes try to save logs floating down a raging river.
Space Mountain - Disneyworld
The Ride: A rollercoaster through space. Once one of the most exciting coasters in the world, it's now showing a bit of age.
The Movie: Space Cowboys II - Past Prime. Adding in the theme park ride element might just be enough to revamp the ailing Space Cowboys franchise, which began and ended with 2000's Space Cowboys. All your old favorites are back and as feisty as ever. This movie has no plot as of this writing.
Hall of Presidents - Disneyworld
The Ride: Okay, it's not really a ride, but watching animatronic replicas of the presidents is as thrilling as any rollercoaster.
The Movie: Genre (action-adventure) Eddie Murphy, in an Oscar® worthy performance, plays all the presidents as they discover the true meaning of Christmas.
As other theme parks move to cash in on turning rides into movies, the future of cinema has never shined brighter.
Published by Will Wright
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5 Comments
Post a CommentAmazing article! If these movies ever do come out, I'll be sure to refer my friends to Will Wright, the movie monk! These sound great, and I hope you will get these to work!
I could see Al Gore as Zeke..ha...and Eddie Murphy's love interest should be Robin Williams.
great article
bad movies
Excellent article. I'll avoid these.
The Small World ride would not work, except as a sugary-coated G movie. With a little writing, I think Space Mountain had potential. After all, what does Jack Sparrow have to do with anything on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride?