Motherhood Tough

After being a single mother of 2 1/2 years, looking back on everything, I see that I have really been taught many things. Everything that I have been taught I don't always keep in the forefront of my mind like I should to constantly be reminded of how precious life really is. Reflecting on things that has happened over the last couple of years and the kind of person I was then compared to the kind of person I am now is just simply nothing short of amazing. In this day and time, I feel that it is so important for a person to stop and take a breath and just focus on themselves for a minute and see how far they have come and the things that they have learned a long the way that we don't always think about.

Counting to 10 has never been more important. This is something that is funny when you are not in the midst of having to do so. My patience is tried each and everyday, especially with a sometimes attitude driven little 2 1/2 year old boy running around the house. There are times when I become so angry with something that he has done after I have asked and told him not to do so that I just want to scream out loud. However, in those times is when you need to count to 10 and regain yourself for a moment. Excusing yourself goes hand in hand with this as well. Counting to 10 doesn't always work or if it does sometimes you don't want to have to sit there and count to 10 so many time you actually count to 120. That is why I have to excuse myself and walk out of the room sometimes. Even after I calm myself, occasionally I will say something else and he begins yelling at me or throwing things. This is when I can't handle counting to 10 anymore and instead of doing something I walk away for a moment to catch my breath.

Embrace all moments. This is hard to do sometimes because you're not going to be so quick to embrace the moments your toddler is throwing food across the kitchen or shoving a whole roll of toilet paper into the commode when your back is turned. It's a later time when you learn to embrace those moments that once drove you crazy though. It drives me absolutely crazy when my little boy does something he knows he's not suppose to do. I know that he knows because after he does it, he begins getting an attitude about it. When time passes and I look back on the situation, I seem to embrace it whether it was a good situation or a bad one.

Find humor in as many things as you can. There is a quote that says, "Laughter is the best medicine". Let me just say, whom ever it was that said this must have had it figured out. There are sometimes when my little boy wants to argue and I can't help but to laugh. Yes I may be mad at the moment for whatever the situation may be but if you ever saw his facial expressions, you would know where I was coming from. Sometimes it's just best to try and find humor in things. Laughing just seems to make you feel better. Even if it is later on down the road and you are remembering a situation, it may seem more humorous to you then when you were actually living it in that moment. It is so much better to find the funniness in things then to focus on the frustration that it brings.

Take more pictures then you think you'll want. Looking back over these last couple of years, I wish that I had taken more pictures of things. Whether it be taking pictures of my son playing or taking a nap. I look back on certain days and think, man I wish I had taken a picture of that. Whether we like it or not our kids aren't little babies for very long and as much as we would hope, we aren't going to have our memories forever. I alwas hear people talking about a man or a woman who is really up there in their age and they say things like, "their memory is as sharp as a tack. They can remember what they got for Christmas 3 years ago and can even remember who gave it to them". That may be so, but it only takes that one day to be diagnosed with an illness or for something unexpected to happen and you may lose your memory. The only thing that will be there to back it up are pictures. You can never have too many pictures.

Choose your battles. This is still a lesson that I am struggling with each day. Sometimes with young children you have to pick your battles with them. Otherwise, it does nothing but cause frustration and anger for the both of you. I am by no means saying to let them get away with things. I'm just saying that sometimes something needs to be said quickly and then move on to next.

Cuddle every chance you get. There are some days when my little boy just can't get enough cuddling but there are other days where if I wanted to cuddle with him he will just scream. Thinking back, I remember when he was newborn and it took all I had not to pick him up and cuddle him every chance I had. I was afraid of spoiling him when he was an infant but now thinking back on it, I wish I had just cuddled him anyways. There is going to come a day when he isn't even going to want to hug me. Every parent goes through those terrible, leave-me-alone, teenage years. I just can't imagine my little one growing up and being that old but that day is coming and there will be no more cuddle time.

Give lovins every time you feel the need to. I am constantly kissing and hugging all over my little boy because I just can't get enough lovins. I tell him I love him all the time and every time he tells me he loves me, it melts my heart all over again. Like I said in the previous statement, there will come a day when he will become a teenager and he won't want to be seen with me, much less let me give him hugs and kisses. That's why I want to get all of them I can in now.

There are so many more things that I have learned being a mother but these things are something every mother will learn along the way. It's just taking the time of reflecting back on moments and knowing that you learned them along your journey.