Mothers Need Time and Attention on Mother's Day

Mother's Day is a time we scramble to find just the right gift. Will a gift of flowers do or taking her out to eat? What about that necklace she liked as a gift? Too often, husbands and children pull out wallets and spend lots of money on a gift to show Mom how much she means on Mother's Day. While flowers and a restaurant, even jewelry will be appreciated, if money is the sum of how we appreciate our mothers, we've missed the mark. The gift a mother most wants on Mother's Day is time and attention.

Remember when we were children and we had no idea what to give our mother for Mother's Day? We didn't have money to purchase a fancy gift. What we had we gave-a hug, a picture we drew, and an "I love you." We wanted to be with Mom on Mother's Day. We gave the gift of time and attention and our hearts.

As we grow up, our lives take us away from home and with our busy schedules, we sometimes lose track of what matters most-family. Instead of automatically pulling out that credit card or wallet to buy a gift, consider what it is Mom truly would appreciate. Maybe what she'd appreciate most on Mother's Day, along with flowers, is some time and attention.

Can you visit? If you have a choice between flowers or another gift and gas to visit your mother, use the gas. Call ahead and see if a visit is all right or surprise your mother on her special Mother's Day. Don't just pop in, then head out to see friends. Spend time, talk, listen. Give your mother the gift of time and attention.

A visit just not feasible for Mother's Day? Schedule a visit at another time and let Mom know on Mother's Day when you will be able to visit. Give her the joy of anticipation.

If a visit isn't possible for Mother's Day, the next best gift is a telephone call. Carve out time on Mother's Day to call your mother. Let her know you care. Don't just make it a quick call. Give your mother a gift of time and attention. Talk. Listen. Converse. Tell her how special she is to you. Too often we leave saying those special things and those special words, "I love you," until it is too late. On Mother's Day, make sure to to express your heart.

A card is a wonderful way to convey deep feelings. Often, we can write what we're unable to verbalize. Send Mom either a card by regular mail or one of those animated e-cards. Don't just settle for the greeting on the card. Your gift is to personalize the card. List several ways your mother made a positive difference in your life. (Even difficult parents did some things right-like give us life.)

Get your siblings to also send Mom a special card for Mother's Day, listing those positive differences she made in your lives. If the cards are sent by regular mail, your mother will be able to keep the sentiments expressed and read them those times she gets discouraged.

And, if there is a special woman (an aunt, a neighbor, a teacher) who has played a nurturing role in your life, why not remember her as well on Mother's Day.

Whatever else we decide to do for Mom on Mother's Day, we need to start with two things that Mom needs most-our time and attention.