Mounds of Pounds

All my life
I've had a strife,
Between the body I treasure
And the things that I eat for pleasure.
My tongue has always been loyal
So far has treated me Royal
Now I see it is a sword with two edges
Shaping my body with ledges.
Cannot put a brake
Cannot stop it to shake
Atkin's Diet, you see
Did not work for me.

During the lecture I keep quiet
'Cause I'm told to watch my diet,
So, I watch the food before I eat
Doesn't matter if it's sweet or meat.
I talk a lot of rubbish
I eat a lot of Danish
The weight has to ratchet
Can't take it off with hatchet.
Need to block the access
To all the food in excess
South Beach Diet, you see
Was not made for me.

Many ways have been proposed
Fat still did not get disposed,
Nothing seems to work
Now I feel like a dork.
Have to do whatever it takes
Need to avoid all the yummy cakes,
Studied metabolic calorie shifting
Also learned how to reduce craving.
I need to get a latch
Will also go for a patch,
Jenny Craig, you see
Doesn't wish to see me.

I have been eating a lot
Don't want the blood to clot,
Trying to cut down on junk
My arteries can't have gunk.
I have to take quick action
And show motivation,
Have to workout a lot
That's the only way I've got.
For my health's clean bill
I have to rely on my will,
Mayo Clinic, you see
Isn't a place for me.