Movie Quotes You Need to Know

Movie quotes can be extremely useful. Here's a list of some that I use and like. I hope it's, at least, entertaining.

Movie Quotes from: Monty Python and the Holy Grail

This movie has helped me be a better parent. No, really, it has - stop rolling your eyes. Here, let me explain. We all send our kids to school. We remember what it's like at school. We know our kids are going to face ridicule, pressure, bullies. We can't be there to protect them from it all so we arm them with philosophies that help them endure these things, right? Right.

Let's review this classic piece of dialogue from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Arthur and his squire have just arrived at a castle and Arthur has just mentioned that they both 'rode' all the way from Mercia. The guard on the castle wall thinks that's absurd.

Guard 1
"What, ridden on a horse?"

Arthur
"Yes!"

Guard 1
"You're using coconuts."

Arthur
"What?"

Guard 1
"You've got two empty halves of a coconut and you're banging them together."

Arthur
"So?"

See, it's that last bit that I tell my kids to use. The guard is mocking King Arthur. He doesn't get offended or strike back. No, he takes it in stride. So I tell my kids that if kids harass them, make fun of them, whatever, just use the King Arthur Gambit: "So?"

It works, I swear!

Bully
"Hey, you suck. You're like, an idiot."

Regular Kid
"So?"

Bully
[stands there with dumb look on face, drooling like a retard]

The Black Knight scene helps as well. Let's say one of the kids falls off a bike and gets skinned up. Your first words should be: "I've had worse." Or maybe, "That's just a flesh wound."

It'll make them laugh. Plus, for Dad's, this is a great way to show you care while still being 'tough.'

Movie Quotes from: Star Wars

One of my favorite bits from Star Wars (Episode IV) takes place inside the Millennium Falcon. Luke, Han, Chewie and Obi-Wan climb out of the smuggling compartments and Obi-Wan says he's going to go shut off the deflector shield. Han, of course, thinks he's foolish, even though he's going along with the plan. Obi-Wan then spews out this little gem: "Who's the more foolish: the fool or the fool who follows him?"

I always try to remind myself to either voice a better way to deal with a situation or else support whatever is being done; don't sit and complain about everything.

Movie Quotes from: Anchorman

Whenever I want to completely toy with someone's psyche, I find that Will Ferrell's Anchorman is full of perfect lines. My favorite: "Sixty percent of the time it works every time." Just say that to somebody, about anything and watch their brain try to figure it out.

Anchorman also has the now ubiquitous "that's how I roll" line. The biker that Ron Burgundy had sent careening into disaster kicks Ron's dog off a bridge. Ron had destroyed the biker's bike, something he loved. So the biker struck back and strutted away with only the explanation, "That's how I roll."

I do the same whenever I kick someone's dog off a bridge. Of course, it has other uses, too. When you get upset at work, just fed up with everything and everyone, make sure you throw stuff around a lot on your desk. Knock over a chair or two, storm out of the door bellowing, "That's how I roll!" It makes you feel a lot better. Do this on Friday. It helps. I promise.

Movie Quotes from: Star Trek

Okay, this one isn't actually from a Star Trek movie; it's from the original series. I've always loved Star Trek for it's theme of friendship. I think that whole feeling was summed up perfectly in the episode "Amok Time." This is when Spock must take a wife to calm his Vulcan hormones or else die. Of course, at the same time the Enterprise is given other orders. Kirk must now decide what to do: save his friend or save his career.

As he talks about it with McCoy, he finally says about Spock, "He's saved my life a thousand times over. He's my friend. Isn't that worth a career?"

Some things are more important than jobs or material possessions. People are more important, especially your friends.

Movie Quotes from: The Lord of the Rings

Any of the three Rings films are rife with quotability. For example, how many of us have uttered "my precious" when selfishly clinging to something we like but don't really need? I have.

I especially liked it when Frodo and Gandalf discovered the writing on the One Ring. Frodo said it was Elvish but he couldn't read it. Solemnly, Gandalf says, "There are few who can." I use that line a lot. Once again, I find it useful in parenting. The kids will say something like, 'I can't reach that bowl' and before I know it I've said, 'There are few who can.' Or, 'I can't finish my homework;' or my wife will say, 'I can't do everything by myself, you know.' Gandalf's response is perfect for any of those domestic situations.

Movie Quotes from: Strange Brew

"Beauty, eh." Since the first moment I heard that line it has been ensconced in my vocabulary. In the movie Strange Brew, brother Bob and Doug MacKenzie use this phrase repeatedly. When they get a job, buy rancid chocolate milk from a vending machine, get doughnuts, even when they use bullets to plug a bloody nose, everything is a "beauty, eh."

So, when I drink an excellent beer, it's a 'beauty, eh.' A good dinner is a 'beauty, eh.' A day alone with my wife, a family escape to the lake - all are 'beauties, eh.' My kids ask me if I lived in Canada.

"No, you hosers," I tell them. "But I watched Strange Brew a lot."

You know what they tell me then? "Beauty, eh."

Movie Quotes from: Saturday Night Live

Once again I am a liar. This quote is not from a movie but rather television. I cannot help but include it. It is from an infamous SNL sketch. In this sketch, Will Ferrell, Chris Kattan, Horatio Sanz, Chris Parnell and Jimmy Fallon are portraying the band Blue Oyster Cult. They are in the studio to record "Don't Fear the Reaper." Christopher Walken is playing a famous producer named Bruce Dickinson.

As they begin to play, Ferrell starts tapping his cowbell. The recording session is interrupted when the singer can't take anymore of the cowbell. This happens repeatedly. Christopher Walken keeps coming into the studio and telling them he wants "more cowbell." Finally, he proclaims, "I gotta fever! And the only prescription is more cowbell."

"More cowbell" is synonymous with extra effort. I like to add 'more cowbell' to my beer recipes and make them just a tad unique. Kids can add 'more cowbell' to their schoolwork. I suppose I could add 'more cowbell' to my job - but let's not get too carried away.