Moving in with Family Due to Financial Crisis

Many of us are feeling the pinch of the economy and while it is projected to be on the upswing, piecing together our individual lives is still daunting. One way a lot of us have gotten through the worst of it is by moving in with family. This drastic lifestyle change can prove to be highly stressful for all involved and much of the time can even result in shattered relationships.

Having lived with my in-laws for over a year, here are some tips that should make your temporary living arrangement more bearable.

Learn and Understand the Rules

Every household has rules for their members to live by. Whether there are rules on shower times or rules regarding eating habits, expect to be educated on the rules of your extended family's household shortly after you move in. Learn these rules and do your best to adhere to them no matter how much you disagree with them. Rules and expectations seem to be the biggest cause of arguments within combined households. It makes sense really. You have lived as an adult under your own roof with your own family for years. Having to live under a completely new set of rules will make you feel like a kid again and can limit your personal freedoms. Remind yourself that this is not your house and therefore not your rules. It is easy to forget this and get defensive and angry when confronted about rule breaking.

Keep the Peace/Choose Your Battles

This is the time that your curiosity in meditation and stress relief exercises will come in handy and will save you from a lot of grief later. Go ahead and buy those self-help books you've been eyeing. They will prove to be helpful during your stay. Every day will bring spats, arguments and general eye rolling disagreements between you and your hosts. It's important to learn to let things slide and to choose your battles wisely. If one or more of you are unemployed, this will be greatly important since you will be in the same space for several hours a day. Put what you learn about meditation to use during this time to help avoid unnecessary stress.

Offer to Help

Now that you are living with other adults don't forget that you are an adult yourself. It's easy to fall into kid mode when you realize you don't make the rules and you are living with family again. To help combat that feeling, offer to help around the house. Chores, small house repairs, or anything that you can do to show your appreciation to your hosts and to keep yourself busy can go a long way in the healthy cohabitating department.

Never Lose Hope

Keep hope alive by looking for a way out of your predicament. Spend time looking for jobs, tweaking your resume or even enrolling yourself into school to finally get that degree you've always wanted. Anything that helps you and your family get one-step closer to moving out on your own should be a daily goal. Set goals for yourself and work toward achieving them a little at a time. Don't set unrealistic goals and deadlines. Doing so can only cause more stress and frustration and does little toward keeping hope alive.

Conclusion

It's a very difficult life to live when having to move in with family but constantly remind yourself that it could be worse. There are families living on the streets, in their cars, and in homeless shelters due to the economy. The fact that you have relatives or friends willing to open their home to you and your family is a blessing. Live day to day and keep positive thoughts while working hard toward being independent again. There will be some days much harder than others and there will be many nights of insomnia and worry. This is normal but if it is unmanageable don't be afraid to ask for help. There are some support groups online for people in situations much like your own. Logging in and participating or even just lurking can give you a lot of emotional support and many times you can even get ideas and suggestions that you may not have thought about. Find a group you feel comfortable with and know that you are not alone. Things really do get better.