Music Instrumental in Child's Development; Replaces Television

One night, when I was about twelve, my sister, brother and I were fighting over what we wanted to watch on television. My mom, who was reading a book in the kitchen, got fed up with our arguing and made us shut off the television and go to bed. She told us she was sick of the family fighting over the TV all the time and she was going to put a stop to it.

The following day we had a family meeting and it was explained to us that television was a privilege and that because we couldn't get along watching it, we would be limited as to when we watched television and new rules were laid out. Being the rotten kids we were, we tested our parents and continued to come home, not do our chores as we should have and we watched the soaps, learning to quickly shut off the TV before our parents got home. We got caught right away and my dad decided to enforce the no television watching by cutting off the television plug and hiding it. That way, he felt that he could control our television viewing by preventing us from turning it on.

My brother, who was maybe nine at the time, figured out that if we cut off the plug to the light, and attached it to the television, we could still watch T.V. so that is what we did. We were sneaking around like that for a few weeks until my dad came home early and realized the television was warm. We had to confess to our sins. I'm sure it scared my parents that we were playing with electricity. That weekend, the television went to the dump, and for the rest of the years that I lived with my parents, we never had a TV.

What to do with no television

Sometimes our teachers would give us assignments to watch something on television but my mother would write a note and ask that they give us extra work to make up for not being able to do the assignment. She would explain that watching television had divided our family and she wasn't going to permit it. Living at home was pretty boring right after that but we found things to do. We all became avid readers, my brother even somewhat of a champ at crossword puzzles. The other thing that changed for us was that we began playing music together. We all learned instruments, and not unlike the Von Trapp Family Singers, we began to take our songs outside of our home, and into the public.

On every family trip road trip that I can remember, we made the drive tolerable by singing. We harmonized as a family with my mother taking the high soprano, and dad taking the baritone notes. My sister and I alternated between alto and soprano and my brother almost always sang the harder, dissonant notes. He has a tremendous ear and knack for music, just like my dad.

Over the years my brother has learned to play almost every instrument I can think of from the banjo and harmonica, to the flute, saxophone, all the brass instruments, piano, guitar and drums. My sister plays the sax and the flute. I played the clarinet and the guitar, my dad the clarinet and the sax, and my mom, the drums, the sax and now the viola.

During the Christmas Season, we would sing harmonies and take our instruments to go caroling around our neighborhood and into the elderly village next door. We visited sick people and shut- ins. It always felt wonderful to give the gift of music -to share our voices and instruments to give others happiness.

When I was 16, I played my guitar in a local restaurant and rented a room from a family in town. On Sunday nights they would have friends over, and we would eat venison from a deer we had shot that season or ham from one of the pigs we had raised. We named them Grote and Weigel. There would be banjos, guitars, harmonica's and even the spoons, being played. I always had a blast at these jam sessions and they bring back fond memories.

Adults still making music and giving joy

As adults, music is still a strong part of life. My sister plays her flute in church and at special events. My brother and I are in a band together, along with my husband, who plays drums. My mom and my dad are in a senior's citizens' orchestra. On birthdays, it is tradition to call the birthday boy or girl and sing to them.

As an adult, I have five televisions in my home but I rarely turn them on. I would choose a jam session over watching the tube any day of the week. When I clean house, I sing. When I am in the shower I sing, when I am in the garden, tending my water garden or yard, I sing because singing allows me to release emotion in a healthy way and it makes me happy.

Recently I was singing in the bathroom while putting on my makeup and my husband, out of the blue, said to me, "I love to hear you sing." He had never told me that before, even though I've been singing in a band with him for 12 years.

I didn't know that he even cared, let alone that it made him happy. But I guess that's part of being in a family and building a home. Some of my fondest family moments were riding in a car singing or going Christmas caroling. It makes sense that I have carried that music tradition into my own family.