My Experiences Using Craigslist for Online Dating

As someone completely new to the world of online dating, I wanted to try lots of different things to find a good fit for me. Initially, I gravitated toward Craigslist because it's free, and I didn't have to commit to posting an entire profile or answering countless match questions. I could toss up an ad in a few minutes time and take it down instantly if I didn't like the results.

I was also drawn to Craigslist because the site appeals to a wide demographic. It seems like everyone has used Craigslist for something, whether that was buying a new futon or trying to track down that hottie from the bus stop you couldn't work up the courage to talk to. I scored my current teaching job (that I love) from an ad I originally saw posted on Craigslist, so I figured it couldn't be that bad of a place to look for love.

The stigma

The problem with using Craigslist for online dating is that you're not supposed to use Craigslist for online dating. For women, Craigslist is purportedly full of creepers. At best, they want to send you penis pictures. At worst, they want to kill you and deposit your defiled corpse in a dumpster. For men, Craigslist is supposedly the last stop to pick up desperate women who are so unattractive or have failed at life so badly that they have no other means for attracting potential mates.

While Craigslist certainly has earned some of its stigma for online dating, just about everyone I know has tried it at some point in time or another. There still had to be normal (or normal-ish) people still looking for love with their sublets and odd jobs on Craigslist, right?

The emails

While I received a few emails that were obviously spam, I was pleasantly surprised at the number of quality responses I received to my ads. Unfortunately, around emails number three or four, several of the guys I chose to correspond with felt the need to make confessions before we met in real life. "I'm really 48." "I'm only 19." "I haven't had a job in two years." Uh-oh. I wonder if these gentlemen thought that if they verbally charmed me first, I'd be willing to overlook age-inappropriateness (I'm 30) or potential financial dependency.

The dates

On the bright side, I did meet a few nice people from my experiences using Craigslist. One gentleman whose ad I responded to was a very talented artist, but obviously emotionally damaged. We dated in real life for about three weeks, until he decided I was probably going to abuse him like his father did and cut off contact. Yikes.

Another gentleman lasted four dates, until I decided that the frequent mentions of his ex weren't going away any time soon, and if that I didn't want to live with the constant comparisons, I should move along. Also, this dude was dull. Seriously, seriously dull. We did lots of fun things, but the conversation never progressed past our days at work and his ex-girlfriend. Frankly, I'm not sure how we managed to correspond by email for so long without losing interest.

Results?

After placing a two ads and responding to some others over a period of a couple months, I came to the conclusion that Craigslist is fun diversion. It's an interesting way to meet oddballs, weirdos, insomniacs, and lonely hearts. On the other hand, the men I met through Craigslist had some issues. Some couldn't function in the real world away from their computer screens. Others were obviously still hung up on past issues. Still others had turned to Craigslist hoping that online dating would be a way to find people willing to overlook huge flaws.

Would I use Craigslist again to find a potential suitor? No. From my experiences on Craigslist, I've discovered that dating sites that require more time and investment on the part of the user attract people who make better dates. Because Craigslist requires so little from the people who use it, it makes sense that its users might not be quite ready for real human interaction on a dating level. Craigslist works well for free furniture, but its personals section seems better designed for hooking up than forging real relationships with quality people.