My Feelings of Dealing with Infertility

Every little girl dreams of the day she will become a mother, and what she will do with her children. For some those dreams are shattered when they face the challenges of infertility. There is nothing harder then to hear someone else is pregnant, while you are happy for them you can't help but wonder why it can't be you. What did you do wrong that you have to suffer this sadness. Some days it may be so bad you cant even look at a baby or child without crying and wishing you could have your own. People will try to offer the support but if they have never experienced infertility they don't know how it truly feels.

Its makes it harder to hear someone say you will have a baby when its meant to happen, or stop trying so hard and you'll become pregnant, like its that easy. Everyday woman get pregnant, its what our bodies were designed to do, but for some reason my body is broke in that department. There are many different treatment options available each with their own side effects. And month after month of no positives pregnancy test really takes a toll on you emotionally. Infertility can destroy a relationship; the stress of everything having to be times and planned can be very hard to cope with. The financial strain infertility can put on you is tremendous.

Most treatments will not be included in your insurance, so you pay for everything out of your pocket, and the tests and meds are not cheap by any means. Finally you come to a point that you begin to wonder if it will ever happen, will you ever be able to hold your precious bundle of joy in your arms. This is the way I have felt and still feel about infertility, I have PCOS and do not ovulate .So that means I can not get pregnant. I was told without treatment that I would never get pregnant. Luckily for me I was blessed with a daughter. Now you might ask then why do I still feel this way about infertility, well its because I want more children, I want my daughter to experience the joy of having a brother or sister. People tell me I should be happy with what I have, and while I am, I also long for another child, I know how wonderful it is to look into your babies eyes, and how it melts your heart the first time they smile at you.

How great it is when they take their first steps, and say their first words. I want to go through the sleepless nights and diaper changes again. I have come to accept that I might never have another child but it doesn't make the pain any less, especially when my daughter asks why she cant have a brother or sister and I have to figure out how to explain to a six year old that my body is broken. It's not fair, I see people that can get pregnant by just looking at there husband, and I have to have everything on a schedule, that sure takes any romance out of it.

Let me offer some advice to people who want to give support to someone dealing with infertility don't tell them to relax and quit trying, or it will happen when its meant to, or any other well meant line, just listen to them, allow them to get their anger and frustrations out .If they need to cry let them, don't try to make them stop. And if you know someone that is expecting please don't try to hide the news to keep from hurting the person dealing with infertility this doesn't help it hurts twice as bad. Some days I can sit and watch show on TV dealing with having babies and others it's just too painful. Remember when you are the one dealing with infertility there is no right or wrong way to feel, you just have to learn to deal with your feelings. I still will never give up the hope of becoming a mother again, every time I miss a period I wonder if there is the slightest chance that this could be the month.