Myths About Emo Teens

The emotional hardcore or "emo" lifestyle is often misunderstood, and parents of emo teens often have misconceptions about what being emo truly means. At its simplest, to be emo simply means to express oneself emotionally through music, clothing, hairstyle, and behavior. With roots in emo rock music and alternative fashion, an emo personality is one that is very personal and individual.

Unfortunately, because the emo look is not a mainstream one, there are many myths that persist about emo teens. Understanding these myths is the first step toward debunking them and realizing that even an emo teen is still just a teenager, struggling to find themselves in a culture that may not suit them.

Emo Myth #1: All Emo Teens Are Depressed

Truth: While emo music and behavior may not be the sunshine and smiles that were familiar to parents when their children were younger, it is not true that anyone who calls themselves emo has severe depression problems. All teens may have periods of morose behavior when they can't seem to understand their bodies, friends, and feelings, but just because they dress differently or wear an emo hair style does not mean they are depressed.

If parents are concerned about teenage depression, they should look beyond superficial characteristics such as hair style or fashion. A teen who remains isolated from close friends, lacks interest in former favorite activities, and radically changes personality in a short period of time may have depression issues and professional help should be consulted.

Emo Myth #2: All Emos Are Cutters

Truth: The practice of self-mutilation or "cutting" is not isolated to emo teens, nor is it a guarantee that any teen with an emo personality will practice this form of emotional distress. While many emo teens will wear long sleeves, it is not always to cover self-inflicted wounds. If parents are concerned about cutting, they should have their teenager physically examined by a doctor who can spot signs of this type of behavior and recommend treatment options.

Emo Myth #3: All Emos Are Poor Students

Truth: Any teenager's grades may slip if they are uninterested in their classes or if they are enrolled in classes that are more challenging than those they've taken previously. With many other demands on a teenager's thoughts, including socializing, dating, and fitting in, getting good grades may not have as high a priority as it once did.

Instead of panicking over falling grades, parents should speak with their child's teachers to see if there are any clues in the student's classroom behavior that could indicated boredom or material that may be too difficult. Whether or not the teen dresses like an emo, listens to emo music, or wears their hair in an emo style is irrelevant to their academic performance.

Emo Myth #4: All Emos Do Drugs

Truth: Experimenting with illegal substances may be part of many teenagers' experiences, but not necessarily because they consider themselves emo. Embracing the emo culture can be a rebellion of sorts that may lead to drug experimentation, but savvy parents who monitor their child's activities and can recognize symptoms of drug use can help keep their children safe. Drug use is just as popular among teens in any culture, whether they are athletes, goths, emos, or academics, and many teens in each of those subgroups never experiment with drugs.

Emo Myth #5: Emos Have Poor Personal Hygeine

Truth: Because emo fashion embraces ripped clothing, dull colors, and matted or sculpted hairstyles, it is often assumed that these teenagers fail to bathe or wash their hair as frequently as they should. This is just as untrue as saying that all athletes stink or a girl who always wears jeans never shaves her legs. Parents can easily monitor how frequently their child's clothing is cleaned and what hygiene habits they have to ensure this is never a concern.

Emo Myth #6: All Emos Have Long Hair

Truth: There are many different types of emo hair styles, from long, thick hair to spiked, razored looks. While long bangs that dangle over the eyes are one of the most characteristic emo styles, that is not the only look. At the same time, many parents are anxious about their teenager, particularly young men, growing longer hair and otherwise altering their appearance.

Instead of creating an argument about the style, simply check to be sure it is suitable for the school's dress code requirements and allow your teenager to express themselves with a personal look. If necessary, compromise by finding an emo style that can be pulled back or restyled for more reserved situations, such as attending church or working at a part-time job.

Emo Myth #7: Only Guys Can Be Emo

Truth: While most emo rock bands and musicians are young men, many young women are embracing the emo look with unique hair styles and modern fashion. Whether male or female, being emo is a way for teenagers to explore culture in their own way and add their own personal twist to it.

Emo Myth #8: All Emos Are Homosexual

Truth: One of the most persistent myths about emo teens is that they are either homosexual or bisexual. In fact, many teens do experiment with their sexuality, even with their own gender, but taking the time to explore who they are does not cement them into one type of sexuality. Because many emo teens tend to hang out with the same small circle of friends, rumors persist that they are sexually active with one another, regardless of their gender, but this is no more true than to say that all cheerleaders are promiscuous. How one teen explores his or her sexuality is a personal and deeply private matter. Concerned parents, however, can make themselves available to talk to their teens without judging them, letting their children know that they will always be loved and accepted by their parents.

Being emo is a choice about fashion, personality, and individual style. While there will always be some emo teens who fit the myths and stereotypes about this popular subculture, it is important for parents to realize that being emo isn't about turning into someone else, but it's about a teenager exploring who they are. Parents who are willing to communicate openly and nonjudgmentally with their teenagers may find themselves learning a lot more about the emo culture, and about their teen, without concern about common emo misconceptions.