Narcotic Prescriptions Out of Reach

Have you ever felt just frenzied? Unable to focus, work or accomplish anything? I have felt like this a lot and while I was always teased for being "so ADD" I never really thought it was true. I had a psychiatrist who even doubted it because I seemed calm in her presence, though my psychologist (who can't prescribe drugs) who saw me for a longer period of time said it was obviously the case.

Eventually I saw a doctor who had both the vision and the credentials to help me with my problem. While seeing her I tried about 5 different drugs over a period of a few months and we found the perfect cocktail that increased my performance, focus, and even my relationships greatly in that I was able to really be present with people I spent time with and not be distracted by every fleeting thought in my head or shiny object in my view.

That was a few years ago at this point. When I have insurance my drugs (3 kinds) are each $35 co-pay and for my doctor the co-pay is $20. Paying the $90/month wasn't a huge deal and everything was going well as I said for years however then something happened.

I lost my insurance.

That's not the whole story actually, first the subsidy ran out, see our insurance is provided through COBRA which we got after my husband was laid off almost a year and a half ago. For a long time the subsidy kept our payments payable with the unemployment which was less than half of the salary prior so long as we didn't pay our utility and mortgage payments regularly. Once the subsidy ran out our cost went from around $350 to well over $1,200 which is not possible with our budget, especially considering we are fighting foreclosure while filing a bankruptcy at this point and have lawyer fees as well as having to pay for gas to get to and from interviews and appointments. We need food to eat as well.

So, without insurance the drugs, that make it so that I can do some consulting work and am almost making enough money to start making some bigger regular payments, are well over $100 as well as my doctors appointment which is even more expensive comes to over $300 every month. With a budget around $2,000 this is a big hit, especially when school is about to start and new clothes and supplies are needed, not to mention some major car repairs that have been waiting for months, because the assigned district school is over two miles away we would really like to get the car fixed in the next few weeks rather than start our almost 5 year old on a bus at such a young age.

Point being that the drugs that brought some sanity to my life are now almost like a dream that is slipping away. I am only taking them some of the time in case I can't afford to get to the doctor next month to get the next prescription. I am concerned that all the work I have gotten started on since taking the medications which is scheduled to be paying very well soon might slip away because I know that wi/out these medications I will not be so laser focused and able to accomplish as seamlessly as I am now.

This is a story written from a fictional perspective of a few people who I know very well. I have watched them transform into productive members of society from the nervous wrecks they were before finding the correct drugs to balance the dopamine insufficiency in their brain.

What I don't understand, and why I wrote this article is that the people who are living the perspective that I am writing from are adults, and for them to not be able to get the drugs that make them functional simply doesn't make sense to me. Why are addictive drugs like cigarettes with no benefit available to all of us but this drug that some people might abuse but helps many has so many hoops to jump through to obtain it? I think the biggest irony is that someone who was a drug dealer or addict with money would be able to get this drug easily by researching the symptoms and finding a doctor who believed them so long as they are able to pay for all of the co-pays and whatnot. Point being if someone has enough money they can find a way to get it, they can even get it off the street, but a hardworking person with a valid medical diagnosis, and documented need, who is just getting started isn't able to get it if they don't have enough money, which doesn't seem right to me.