New Jersey Nets Stink on Ice: Break NBA Record with 0-18 Start

Worst. Start. Ever. With a loss to the Dallas Mavericks the New Jersey Nets have solidified their place in history. They now hold the record for the worst start to an NBA season. Joining the infamous ranks of the 2008 Detroit Lions and the 1988 Baltimore Orioles, the Nets and their 0-18 record have secured a place in the record books.

Jason Kidd returned to New Jersey and with the help of Dirk Nowitzki and Erick Dampier beat the hapless Nets 117-101 in the walkover that rewrote history. After falling behind by 27 points at the half, the Nets made a mini-run in the 4^th quarter, but it was never really close as they bungled their way to their 18^th consecutive loss.

GM, Kiki Vandeweghe, lost his first, but surely not his last game, as head coach. Vandeweghe, who was, ironically, drafted by the Mavericks in 1980 took over the helm of the Titanic from interim head coach, Tom Barrise, who took over for now-fired Lawrence Frank.

But, are any of these men responsible for the debacle? Well, yeah, but let's face it; when your high scorer is Brook Lopez, you're up a creek.

The team roster reads like an American Idol audition call sheet. Names you've never heard of and never will again. If they could all change their name to Alan Smithee they probably would.

The stats speak for themselves. Averaging just 85.7 points per game and with Rafer Alston contributing a team high 4.5 assists per game; you're not going to win many. Heck, you can't even beat the Lady Huskies with numbers like that.

No doubt Russian Bagillionare Mikhail Prokhorov is rethinking his plan to become an investor in this sideshow. There have to be better ways to invest $200 million. You could buy the Anaheim Might Ducks and still have enough left over to give Ferrari Enzos to 90 or so of your closest friends, a position for which I'd like to apply immediately.

Maybe the real problem with the New Jersey Nets is that they play in a place called the Izod Center, which would be fine if the Nets were a tennis team. Or maybe the problem began when they chose their team name because it rhymed with the other local team names: Jets and Mets. Maybe they should have called themselves the Spankees instead.

Whatever the reasons for their catastrophic season, there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. There's more history to be made. The New Jersey Nets can extend that streak and shoot for something really big. The 1972-73 Philadelphia 76ers hold the title for the worst NBA record ever, a jaw-dropping 9-73. I have faith in the Nets. They can do it. They're really and truly that bad.