New Reasons Why Green Jello Sucks: Worst Band Ever Continues World Domination as World's Worst Band

If you aren't too sure of why people all over the world are saying "Green Jello sucks!" and you look it up on the internet and find out it's spelled Green Jellÿ and you think your head just might explode right off of your body then Friend, you're in luck. Let the accusations fly on a few reasons why Green Jellö still sucks.

Green Jellö originally, a Kraft Foods lawsuit forced the band to change their name. The band chose Green Jellÿ but claims it's still pronounced Green Jello on account of the umlaut. Then there's the fact that the late Joey Ramone told the New York Rocker that Green Jellö was "the worst band" to ever open for the Ramones.

They also received the fastest gonging I've ever seen when the Green Jellö posse went on The Gong Show back in 1987.

Early Green Jellö band members Danny Carey and Maynard James Keenan quickly realized how much Green Jellö sucked and quit the band. Carey and Keenan went on to form Tool, and Tool went on to win three Grammy Awards.

And Green Jellö still remains the worst band ever

See how many reasons you and your buddies can spot for yourself when Green Jellö performs live at Skatopia's Bowl Bash near, on or around July 31st through August 5th, 2009. If you punked out last year the ante has been upped: Brewce and his skate dudes have built a mother-lovin' amphitheater out there in Amish country, Ohio but in addition to Green Jellö the Skatopia amphitheater will also reportedly house the likes of Slayer. Other bands rumored to be there include Beefcake the Mighty and his pack of livid killing machines known as GWAR, and on a longshot this kid at Backwoods Blowout 2008 told me Slipknot would play Bowl Bash 2009. But I think he's full of crap.

All the BS aside, Green Jellö puts on an amazing live show with a ton of huge costumes and other bizarre oddities. "Electric Harley House (Of Love)" is one of the top 10 live experiences a person can have, and I mean that. That song rocks! Plus when they play "Anarchy in Bedrock," the giant Fred Flintstone head begins to resemble Johnny Rotten for a minute and you realize Green Jellö is one of the most Anarchaic punk rock bands still alive and kicking in 2009.

And of course I won't fail to mention that the Bone Fags will also be playing Bowl Bash 2009 sometime around July 31st through August 5th. Details are skim but one thing remains unchanged: If you go to a single event in the summer of 2009, make the pilgrimage to see Skatopia. If you make it out alive you'll be stoaked to tell your friends all about it only to find out all you can really say about the place is, "Man, you have to go!"